The Mega-Zine Museum
May 26, 1997
BASKET CASE Does anyone know why the Placebo Concert at the Manchester Apollo has been postponed?
MISS NESCAFE would like to share a joke: What's the difference between an orange and a packet of Maltesers? An apple!
AMERICAN WANNABE SK8R gives us a tip for the week: Invest in a friend who works at your favourite store. I get 30% off in several sports stores. If anyone out there works in sport shops and has loads of mates, BEWARE.
DEAR 'ZINE
Fear not my friends I am back!
I feel really sorry for that lady off the "VIVA" hair colour advert.
Firstly because she has to wear that hideous green suit and secondly because nobody in her house can talk. They all have to communicate through sticky notes and even the music only says one word.
The Heavenly Nobody
Heavenly Nobody you have obviously been
AWAY FAR TO LONG!
DEAR 'ZINERS
Here's a question for you: What do the Spice Girls and Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles have in common?
Here's the answer: They both call out for power for themselves, ie. The turtles battle call of 'Turtle Power' and the Spice Girls feeble shout of 'Girl Power'.
The Wonderbird!
PS. I'm sorry if I upset any Turtle fans by comparing their heroes to the Spice Girls.
Do I hear the whispered voices of
THE TURTLES ARE ALSO BETTER DANCERS!
TO ALL MORTAL PEOPLE
Ha ha ha. We are winning and there is nothing you can do to prevent us now. We will soon dominate the 'Zine.
All the vampires in Britain will soon unite right here on this screen. Even WLW will be a vampire.
Do not fear, join us now and no harm will come to you. Become one of us. Be a vampire.
Sweet Gothic Vampire, with blood red hair
WLW has a major aversion to a grazed
KNEE - LET ALONE DRINKING THE STUFF!
DEAR 'ZINE
A number of questions to ponder:
If Jimmy Saville and Peter Stringfellow had a fight, who would win?
Whatever happened to Cannon and Ball?
Why do hardly any bakeries make cream horns anymore?
And if anyone else has seen the film 'The Usual Suspects', who the hell is Keyser Soze?
The Dove from Above
Ball apparantly was shot by Cannon
HE-HEE HA-HA HE-HEE HA-HA
