The Mega-Zine Museum
August 11, 1996
DAISYCHAIN says a vegetarian teacher interrupted her while she was making a daisy chain. He said: "Stop doing nasty things to daisies." Touchy!
THE 'TACHE beats summer boredom by getting Sir Jimmy Savile to dance on a beachball for a long time. Good to see Jim is still fixing it for people.
SLEEPFLOWER claims it was he who began the love letter revolution on 'Zine. Sorry, did I miss something?
ONE OF THE BLONDES asks 'Ziners if they
were a packet of crisps, what flavour
WOULD THEY BE? P(R)AWNS, OF COURSE!
DEAR ULTIMATE'S BOYF
I was truly sorry to hear about you being related to Johnny Dean. You have my sympathy.
But your letter has stirred an interest in me and I would love to hear from any other 'Zinesters with famous relations.
My preferences are for any unfortunate enough to be related to Jimmy Hill, Shane Richie, Dale Winton or Mavis from Coronation Street. Cheers!
The Inbetweener, searching for celebs
WLW sees Jimmy often on Fulham High Rd
TOP MAN. TOP FOOTY TEAM, TOO!
DEAR 'ZINE
Where are all the intelligent, attractive men in the world? (Here in Fulham, of course!)
Are they all dead? Is there an alien conspiracy to take over the world by ridding it of all remotely intelligent men? Is it a case for The X Files?
Or do all men think women find boring, stupid chat-up lines attractive? Help!
Ms Marmalade
DEAR 'ZINE
I read in Sainsbury's Magazine about someone complaining that people are always pushing their shopping trollies in the opposite direction to him.
He thinks supermarkets should operate a one-way system to stop congestion.
How sad is this bloke? Next thing he'll be wanting traffic lights!
The Crow
What about double yellow lines and
PARKING METERS. IT'D BE SUCH FUN!
DEAR ZINE
Re: Meetings between 'Zinesters. It's just not meant to be.
Albert the Chicken visited my home town recently and he knows one of my friends, Billy Corgan's Pillow.
I missed him by about five minutes because I got delayed taping some Oasis' thingy. I felt fowl!
Don't organise 'Zine meetings - they'll never happen.
Rainbow Trout
It's only to be expected in your case
TROUT'S WATCH WASN'T WATERPROOF!
