The Mega-Zine Museum
May 6, 1996
BLUE-JEANED JELLY-BEAN II thinks Mega-Zine is mind-numbingly bad. That's nice.
MOLLY'S HAMSTER also thinks the letters are nonsensical. Well forgiiiiive me.
NORTHERN SOUL has just completed the Daily Telegraph cryptic crossword.
MR EINSTEIN dislikes university shtyou-dents, Dolores of the Cranberries, BMW drivers and joyriders.
INVISIBLE wishes girls would look beyond boys' looks.
And boys don't do the same?
WHY'S PAM A. SO POPULAR THEN?
THE WEATHER FOR MANCHESTER
Monday: Showers of sulphuric acid rain so be sure to take the usual precaution - copper umbrellas.
Tuesday: Rain, rain, rain, rain, rain.
Wednesday: Rain, rain, rain, rain, rain (we have the same weather every day except in August when it's sunny for 10 seconds. We slap on the sun cream, get out the deckchairs and have a barbecue. We never tan or get to eat the food as it starts raining.)
Northern Soul
BITING SATIRE
Purple lemons! Cabbages and kippers. I've got a pet piano called Roger.
Purple! Mad! Mad! I'm totally insane! Purple! Jelly! Cabbages! Purple!
Hey, am I surreal yet? Hope you all found me breathtakingly amusing.
The Bhagavat, sitting at home
Gales of uncontrollable laughter
ROCK THE OFFICE TO ITS FOUNDATIONS
DEAR 'ZINE
Help! For the last four years, since the release of Automatic For The People I have had sleepless nights trying to work out the chorus to The Sidewinder Sleeps Tonight.
My brother thinks it's Going To Jamaica but I think it's Coming To Wake Her Up. Please could someone confirm this or set me straight.
Shiny Happy Man on the Moon,
Out of Time
MY TOP TUNES IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:
- Paint It Black - The Rolling Stones
- I Can't Be With You - The Cranberries
- Slide Away - Oasis
- I Am The Resurrection - Stone Roses
- Just When You're Thinking Things Over - The Charlatans
- I Am The Walrus - The Beatles
Tim The Tim
PS Celtic for the League next year
What about Size of a Cow by the
STUFFIES OR ANYTHING BY AIRHEAD?
SOME UNKNOWN FACTS
Miss Piggy with... does not exist. She was made up by AFKA Gonzo in a desperate unloved moment to spice up his ego after a spot of girl trouble.
Tath and Bob are one person with a split personality. Bob is everything Tath dreams of being.
Savo never was. WLW decided to go in disguise.
Cobain's Mood Swing,
in a philosophical mood
Are you omniscient or summat?
DON'T BE SUCH A CLEVER CLOGS!
