Mega-Zine
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March 29, 1996

JON E P wants the world to know that Chris Evans is gorgeous!

SURLY HERMIT If one cannot send a decent envelope to WLW, then please do not bother writing again!

RAGING INDIE BUTTERFLY says you can get a pint of milk from your local Spar shop for a mere 32p!

THE MEATLESS PUPPET is totally obsessed with APPLES, and needs help!

MIDNIGHT MUFFIN wants to try the planet

Pluto next with Dr Strange, but needs

TO KNOW IF HE IS UP FOR IT!

 

TO ALL METAL DUDES

We must unite to rid the world of all other people. Especially two indie freaks named Liz and Anna, who mock our way of life.

We must take over, as other people are too narrow-minded to accept us.

Headbanging rules forever! See you in the mosh pit!

Female Versions of Wayne and Garth

 

4 STRANGE THINGS ABOUT THE SOAPS

  1. Have Cindy & Ian Beale's children been abducted by aliens?
  2. Are Take That splitting up so that Gary can resume his role as Tugg in Home & Away?
  3. Why doesn't Jack Duckworth get a new pair of glasses now that he is richer?
  4. Did Ethel's Willy really die or is it another case of alien abduction?

Jacks Optical Appliance Plaster

You went on way too much.

WE COULD ONLY FIT 4 ON!

 

WHAT HO 'ZINESTERS

Thought I'd better let you know that Basingstoke is set to declare independence, shares in concrete are about to rocket, and our President has declared an Amnesty for all 'Zine writers.

Must dash, someone has just suggested raising the school leaving age to 60, thereby solving unemployment!

Toodle pip!

RODDERS

 

DEAR ALL

Programmes you enjoy when you are bored or stressed out of your mind:

  • Countdown - you play the word games.
  • This Morning - you phone in.
  • Esther - you shout excitedly at the screen.
  • Newsnight - You find it fascinating.

The Muso

If you watch these programmes, you are

TOO OLD AND SAD TO BE WRITING TO US!

 

DEAR 'ZINE READER

STOP stereotyping people because of which part of the country they come from.

Why? Because if you do that about people who come from different countries, you are called racist. So you think it's alright to do it in your own country.

Stereotypers = SAD. Get Lives.

Demonica, Aka Demon Queen of Indie.

I hereby ban all STEREOTYPERS from

APPEARING ON THE 'ZINE AGAIN!