Mega-Zine
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December 25, 1995

FASH'S WAISTCOATS is not a huge fan of John Fash's dress sense. Rather that than an England shirt again!

MR SMARTIE PANTS thinks the letters on Smarties lids represent the genetic code of blue smarties. I thought you saved them up to spell rude words.

5A ~ B x 2 should really be doing maths and not writing letters to the 'Zine.

WLW wishes you all a great Christmas full of dubious indulgence!

Eat too much turkey and chocolate

AND DO NOTHING ON BOXING DAY!

 

DEAR COMMON PERSON

Yes, you! Why shouldn't Pulp have performed in front of Take That fans at the Smash Hits poll winners party?

Menswear described the experience as the most incredible thing they've ever done, and Johnny does a good Jarvis impression, don'tcha think?

The Mad Poet, Singing In The Isles

 

DEAR 'ZINE

Christmas is great and not because of all the commercial tat like the TV shows, the presents and the turkey.

It's because of the enormous fixture pile-up. We've got Liverpool at home tomorrow, Sheff Wed next Saturday and Middlesbrough on New Years Day.

A quick message to anyone who got the blue Villa away kit for Xmas - you traitorous blue-nosed idiots!

Savo, Holte End, K4, Row 19

How typical of sensitive Savo to

REMEMBER THE TRUE MEANING OF XMAS!

 

DEAR 'ZINE

What a suprising upturn to the end of a pretty rank year.

My little five year-old brother had me nearly crying when he gave me my card which he'd made himself at school.

And SHE rang last week, asking if she could come over. She thought, in all honesty, that she thought I might have bought her a Christmas present.

I laughed and hung up.

Sad, But True

I have a feeling that 1996

COULD BE YOUR YEAR, MATE!

 

DEAR BAD LITTLE CHILDREN

Sorry about not bringing you any gifts this year, but you know the score. It costs me an arm and leg forking out on all the good kids. You understand.

RP of Rugby won't be too suprised at his empty stocking following that "event" way back in May at TS's party.

As for, AF and DS, both from Worthing, don't put out a stocking next year either, you filthy creatures.

The Real Father Christmas

Sorry to moan, big man, but

HAVE I BEEN THAT BAD THIS YEAR? ER...

 

ALTERNATIVE XMAS MESSAGE

Not to be outdone by the likes of Herm Ajesty and Quentin Crisp (well I ask you!) I thought I would send all my fellow 'Ziners an inspirational message (and you don't see many of those here).

Christmas is a time for giving - your folks a hard time for all the rubbish presents and socks!!! you get on this special day of worshipping - the god that is Toys R Us and Sega. May all your puddings contain fivers - inflation you know.

Lentils Taste Naff

I have more than a feeling,

THE CYNICS ARE REELING