Mega-Zine
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December 20, 1995

TRADITIONAL CONVENTIONAL GUILD says to be prepared for the consequences if you slag off Bolton. Oh no, we're all going to be relegated!

TRICKLE sent in a poem called Here. Sorry, it won't be printed, dear!

WARCHILD wants to know why Des Lynam is so cool. Wouldn't anyone look cool sat alongside Jimmy Hill?

PEACE & VEGETABLE RITES MAN thinks that Savo is funny. He says: "In fact, both both he and Villa are a complete joke!"

Killer Bee Gambino has buzzed off home

TO THE USA. HIS VISA RAN OUT. BYE!

 

CONTRADICTIONS

  1. Honest politicians
  2. Sensible religion
  3. Health-conscious smoker
  4. West Ham Football Club
  5. Good Blur song
  6. Bad Queen song
  7. Reasonable prejudice
  8. Justifiable killing
  9. Good looking member of Take That
  10. Tragic death of Kurt Cobain

Artist formerly known as Girlieland

 

DEAR 'ZINE

A warning to brothers out there going to buy anything Take That for their sister this Christmas - be careful!

I bought my sister a Take That annual. I was stuck in a huge queue holding it and held up at the counter when the barcode didn't register.

Then when I got out of the store I noticed the bag was completely see-through. Nightmare!

The Joyrider

Take that embarrassment and put an

END TO YOUR NONSENSE!

 

DEAR 'ZINE

Can you print this letter with flashing words and this sentence in blue?

Also, can you make this sentence mauve up to here and then change the colour to yellow?

By the way, in green, Savo is cool and gets my vote for top 'Zinester!

Marco, Roker Park

For today only this page is a

ROKER RAINBOW COALITION!

 

SOME POINTLESS QUESTIONS

  1. Why don't metal detectors ever detect themselves?
  2. Why do UFOs travel thousands of miles through space and land in the middle of a field?
  3. Why does the 'Zine waste screen space showing these pointless questions?
  4. And before you answer that question sarcastically, does anyone know the first two answers?

Gonzo

Another pointless question. Why does

GONZO BOTHER WRITING TO US?

 

DEAR 'ZINE

We hate football. It's boring!

It's only men kicking a ball around a muddy field. Worse still, they're not even good looking.

We'd much rather argue about music. To start it off, we think Blur and Oasis are rubbish!

Female Versions of Wayne and Gareth, making trouble again.

How about arguing who is

MORE UNPOPULAR - WAYNE OR GARETH?!