The Mega-Zine Museum
April 8, 2003
PSYCHIC PSYCHO A few weeks back you mentioned that texters are idiots, but recently you have said that you send about 60 per night. Hhhmmm. My phone bill proves I am an idiot.
THEUNITEDTRUTH Just thought I'd say hi to Farmer Jack as he never really notices these letters of mine. I think, WLW, you need to inform him what a valuable 'Ziner I am. As valuable as a 10p coin when you need a phonebox.
THE KISS OF JUDAS I'll have a beer, please. Not today. I'm detoxing.
'ELLO!
Now then, this is my first e-mail to 'Zine and I'll be very angry if you don't print it. I'd like to get to know you all better (especially that strange man in the corner and the one at the bottom who insults you all on a regular basis).
So, WLW (if that is your real name), tell us all a bit about yourself.
The Funnungrappod
I haven't bit anyone for a long time
MY THERAPIST TOLD ME TO STOP
THE BRIGADIER
I think I'm in a minority here, but I actually quite like the guy. I mean, he is a real-life war hero and all that, so I'm honoured to have him as one of my fellow 'Ziners.
Now, if you'll excuse me, the men in white coats are here to take me away to that pretty place where the flowers grow.
Samurai Hedgehog
Say hello to Briggie as you
VISIT FOR PORT AND NUTS
POETRY CORNER
I thought I'd share a random poem with you guys:
Spaghetti hoops and chicken coops,
Meeting in the bar,
Toothpaste cap and bubblewrap,
Driving in a car,
Big frog hats and alley cats,
My day's been so bizarre!
Monk McManus
Tinned chickens and spaghetti farms
COULD BE THE WAY FORWARD
WOOHOO!
Hoorah! I just looked at Insane Jam Sow's website and found my name!
Firstly, I would like to thank my friends and family — you know who you are! And then I would like to thank, oh, I promised myself I wouldn't cry!
Oh, I'm sorry! The Oscars have already passed this year? Now I just feel stupid!
Greatness That Is Me
Bring your own tissues next time
TO CLEAN UP THE PUDDLE
MY JOB
I went shopping with my darling mother yesterday, and we bought the Heartbeat Love Songs CD.
Despite my usual intolerance of those Police people, the CD is actually really good.
It has things like The Beach Boys, Herman's Hermits and The Mamas and The Papas.
Brilliant.
Frank N Furter's Bride
Did you leave your hearing aid
IN THE SHOPPING MALL?
TUBULAR MONKEY
Here's a limerick that my best friend Karina wrote:
There once was a monkey called Barry,
Who was in love with a tube called Harry,
They went on a date,
And then they did mate,
And ended with a tubular monkey called Larry!
Not A Trendie Not One Of You Either
A playmate for Marcel!
COME JOIN ZINE KARINA
IF 'ZINERS WERE TROUSERS
- Spandorexxa: lycra leggings (the name says it all).
- Bob Flapper: weird flares (funny, but a tad naff).
- Davord: bondage trousers (tough and scary).
- WLW: jeans (the old favourite).
- Briggie: yer grandad's WWII smelly keks (nuff said).
- Me: comfy old cords (worn out but kind of nice).
Anathema
That is my favourite list
OF TODAY WORN IN NICELY
