The Mega-Zine Museum
December 30, 2002
A LEPRECHAUN CALLED STEVE Sometimes, flicking through the channels can be more interesting than actually watching them. Think about it. Don't be sil... hey, you know what? It is!
THE DESPOTIC BANANA Right WLW, so that's agreed. I swap all the socks I get this year for all your chocolate. That's a fair swap. Not on yer life!
BIG BOB FLAPPER So, birds and bees, how does that work? Er... well... the mummy bird and the daddy bee... no, wait...
'ZINERS
As I sit in my room, I see three Pot Noodles (empty), 11 glasses, four empty Coke bottles, 25% of my floor, a few empty dishes, two full ketchup bottles, empty Jaffa Cake tubes, my snorkel hanging out of the cupboard (yes, I do own one) and 70 minidiscs — not one in the right case.
I'm gonna make a great uni student one day!
Sam Got A Snorkel
Pile of dirty washing and a Smiths CD
AND I RECKON YOU'VE CRACKED IT
UNRELENTING EVIL
Has anyone noticed how that Zippy from Rainbow has a similar voice to that of a dalek? Surely this must be a cause for concern.
I personally am running up the stairs as I type this.
The Geek Who Shall Inherit The Earth
Running up the stairs AND typing?
NOW THAT I GOTTA SEE!
FANCY NAMES
So, I understand that dustbin men are now known as refuse relocation experts, eh? If that's the case, then what's your official job title, WLW? Insanity dispenser? God? What is it?
You don't have one? You're working illegally? No contract? Another clever way to avoid tax, eh?
Genius at Work
I have several titles — depends which
GOVERNMENT DEPARTMENT YOU'RE FROM
STUFF
Stuff confuses me. No, little stuff confuses me. Big stuff unravels my brain. Oooh, what a horrible thought.
Hang on — big stuff? Little stuff? That makes no sense at all.
WLW, did you know that if you're blonde, people always expect the worst of you? Can't think why.
Blonde Butterfly
The most frightening thing is that this
ALL MADE PERFECT SENSE TO ME
IT'S A RAINBOOOOOOOOW!
That new George and Zippy song is an insult to the wonder that is Rainbow! They could at least have made an effort to make the song actually worth listening to.
And the Top Of The Pops performance was terrible. I didn't realize George was a cross-dresser. That tiara is soooooo passe!
Butterfly of Shadows
It was the stuff of nightmares
TO BE SURE
HEY HEY
Can I just say that my drama teacher rocks. Remember when it snowed last week? Well, she saw it and TOLD us to run to the window to watch the light flakes of happiness fall from the fluffy white clouds... awwww, so sweet.
Now, as soon as she stops flirting with the student teacher, she'll be almost perfect!
Frank N Furter's Bride
It snowed? Last week? Snowed?
WHERE WAS I?
AHA!
I have finally solved the biggest mystery known to man — I know why you are called WLW!
It's because you are in fact Jim Scott, radio host of Ohio's 700 WLW station! ... or not.
Rusti the Vampire Squirrel
Nah, that's my cousin —
BILLY BOB WLW
