The Mega-Zine Museum
July 15, 2002
SATAN'S RUBBER DUCK Be kind to nerds: one day you'll probably be working for one. Whaddaya mean one day?
SUBATOMIC GENIUS When the going gets tough, I usually just get the bus home! Me too. Via the kebab house.
GrEeN gLuE I'm in love with my geography teacher. Now, Isn't that a pickle? It is. In my experience they only wear beige and want to talk about fjords and glaciers all the time.
REASONS WHY IT'S GREAT TO BE SHORT
- People think you're younger and you pay less on buses etc.
- You can hide under people at gigs when things get dangerous.
- You can wear little kids' clothes, like Fireman Sam T-shirts.
- People think you're sweet and innocent.
Can't think of any more, but that's quite a strong list, right WLW?
The DimGirl (from the molehole)
A very strong list...
SHORTY
X-MEN
I don't know if anyone's seen this travesty of a cartoon, but I really don't see why the original was remade in the first place. This new one is totally and utterly wrong.
I mean, how could they make Gambit evil? He was the best one (apart from Wolverene of course).
Please join me in boycotting this insult to both the original cartoon and comic book.
Polly's Cracker
As someone who never watches it anyway,
CONSIDER IT BOYCOTTED
A MEANINGFUL QUESTION
This troubles me immensely and often keeps me awake at night:
What is outside the universe? It could be nothing, but then what is "nothing"? Is our universe just one of many, all sticking together like peas in a pod?
But then I ask you... what lies outside this pod?
Please help, my head is starting to hurt. Does anybody know?
Spandorexxa
You think too much...
BUY A CAT
'ZINERS,
Does anyone else hate that bear on the advert? He thinks he's so cool, just bristling about like that all over the place.
He's just showing off to the customers. He's a bear for goodness sake!
Somebody put me out of my misery, please.
The Boy Who Lives In A Hicpoia
I know not of the ad you speak —
BUT I HATE IT TOO NOW
WORK EXPERIENCE
Today, I cleaned out the dog kennels, killer chinchillas, horrible hamsters and gruesome gerbils.
I saw a duck with a perm and I got attacked by a cat. As I am allergic to cats, I am now covered in lumps.
I also rescued a goat and for Wolfie the dog out of the pond.
And there's only another nine days of working at the animal sanctuary left!
Teenage Flirtbag
Blimey — what did you do
IN THE AFTERNOON?
WLW,
As you have finally revealed the e-mail address to me, no longer do I have to scrounge a whole 19p to buy a stamp, but I still have to think for a long period of time of anything remotely interesting to say.
As you can tell, I'm still working on the thinking part but, before I go, I just wanna share something: one day... one day... I will be WLW.
Mim Nice But Dim
You really wanna get yourself through
ALL THE EXAMS NECESSARY TO BE ME?
ODE TO KATE
After the delightful and alluring Kate wins Big Brother this year, I would like to whisk her off to my private retreat in Florence.
Once there, we can stroll in my vineyard and take a tipple or two of sherry. I shall feed her fresh bananas and sing sea shanties.
She will find my jocular jingles enervatingly entertaining.
The Brigadier
You keep your jocular jingles
COVERED UP, THANK YOU VERY MUCH
