The Mega-Zine Museum

June 3, 2002

A LEPRECHAUN CALLED STEVE Hmmmm... a list. Should I or shouldn't I? Nah, can't be bothered. Praise be for that.

HALF MAN HALF BISCUIT There is nothing better in life than writing on the sole of your slipper with a biro. I find highlighting my eyelids works for me.

ARMADILLO IN A FAN-ASSISTED OVEN Any tips on teaching a ferret to yodel? Yes, a few, but sadly they will all ultimately finish with a knock at the door from the RSPCA.

NAMES

Apparently my name (my real name) means Bringer of Luck, but it doesn't say what sort of luck.

Is it good luck 'cos I once found £3 down the side of the sofa? Or is it bad luck 'cos yesterday I gave myself THREE dead legs by walking into chairs?

Answers on a postcard, as this could affect my A levels.

Loominous Froot

Hard to say. I mean, my name means.

WELL... WLW, SO WHAT DO I KNOW?

TOP 8 PUPPETS

1. Zippy
2. George
3. Elmo
4. Cookie Monster
5. Grover
6. Gonzo
7. Gordon the Gopher
8. Ed the Duck

These were the only ones I could think of! Feel free to elaborate.

The DimGirl (from the molehole)

Ed the Duck? A puppet?

STUFF AND NONSENSE

TOP 5 WAYS TO GET PRINTED ON 'ZINE:

1. Mention Kim Dawson
2. Mention Kim Dawson
3. Mention Kim Dawson
4. Mention Kim Dawson
5. Er... mention Kim Dawson

So, what exactly is Dawson's Creek? I hear it has three million viewers.

Take My Hand

Nothing to do with the lovely Missy D —

JUST DULL TEENAGE ANGST

THE JOY OF PAIN

I was flicking through the TV guide thing on the Sky remote when I spotted this interesting thing called The Joy Of Pain. Now, this was 10-15 in the morning so I thought "that sounds good" and I pressed select... and it turned out to be The Joy Of Painting!

Not quite what I had in mind!

The Snorkmistress

I hate it when that happens —

THE RUBBISH I'VE ENDED UP WATCHING

WLW AND 'ZINERS

Aren't Wagon Wheels the greatest? I mean, the guy who invented them must either be so rich or so dead that he won't have to work again, ever!

The combination of soft biscuit, marshmallow and chocolate is a mixture of the three most important food groups, and therefore I claim they are the food of the gods. Never mind Ambrosia — a lower class form of rice pudding.

Insomniac Tapeworm

Not much that beats a Wagon Wheel,

A CUPPA AND THE EASTENDERS OMNIBUS

WLW

Having finally discovered the elusive e-mail address for Mega-zine, I am writing with a query about Davord... WHO THE HELL IS HE?

He is always being mentioned, but with no clue as to his identity. His name sounds like an evil wizard, or the baddie in an '80s computer game. Or is he a mythological creature? Like Bigfoot? Or am I just extremely dense?

Please help me, this question has plagued me for many moons.

Littlevicious

He's certainly not mythological —

I HAVE TO CLEAN HIM OUT EVERY DAY

MY STUDENT NEWSPAPER

I did a quiz in my student newspaper to find out what kind of a student I am. I answered all the questions and looked to see what my score was...

"Mostly C: You are He-Man, Master of the Universe."

How did I miss noticing this before?

Soap Sud

I always said that, in a certain light,

YOU WERE A RINGER FOR THE ROCK

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