Mega-Zine
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February 17, 2002

GRILLAMO WLW, do your eyes light up when you read a letter from me? Mine do when I read your bottom of the page message. I have eyes like a traffic light. I'm the green man!

CAPTAIN SLOG Thank heaven that Pop Idol malarky is over. Now let's just forget the whole thing ever happened. Andrew WK anyone? Like Cowell's going to give us a chance to forget!

MONKEY GIRL What idiot told Victoria Beckham she had a mind? David?

 

BAG IT UP

Handbags and gladrags IS by someone else. Rod Stewart originally did it a million times better than the bores of Aberdare.

For excellent covers check out Suicide Is Painless, Pennyroyal Tea (live) and We Are All Bourgeois Now by the MSP.

Mrs TGW Bradfield

You missed off Hey Mickey!

LOLLY LICKS ANYONE?

 

G-STRINGS

GUITARISTS WHO DESERVE MORE RESPECT

  1. Robby Krieger
  2. Robert Young
  3. Andrew Innes
  4. Brian Molko
  5. Christian Ingebrigtsen
  6. Lenny Kravitz
  7. Brendan Brown
  8. 'Fast' Eddie Clarke

Lucozade 'Slow Chord Changes' Lover

Prefer Ben Adams myself —

HE PLAYS THE HAIR GEL RIGHT LOVELY

 

THINGS I HAVE DONE TODAY

  1. Danced to the silence in the kitchen.
  2. Played 10 games of Frustration with my mutti, I won once.
  3. Lay on my bedroom floor waving my arms and legs.
  4. Watched Neighbours.
  5. Sat in the cupboard under the stairs eating chocolate peanuts. The vacuum cleaner looked hungry so I gave him some.

The Rainbow Sheep

Healthier than sucking up sox,

I SUPPOSE

 

NEWBIE

I am a newcomer to the 'Zine business but I hope to become a regular writer to WLW towers.

My first question to Davord (if he can talk!)... who are you? I thought you may be a dog or a cat?

Keep up the funny and good work Megaziners, and WLW.

The One With A GSOH

Mavis didn't find that comparison

VERY FUNNY!

 

BOG OFF!

Don't you find toilet rolls just intolerable? Every time I try to start a new one, it's like some sort of mission. Like finding the end of the sellotape. I can never find where the damn thing begins to unroll.

What's the secret to this dilemma? Can anyone help me?

I should be called Jack The Bog Roll Ripper. Except my name's not Jack.

The Grey Man

Claws like ickle Mavis —

THAT'S THE ANSWER, MY FRIEND

 

LUCKY IN LOVE

An 11-year-old won two Jaguars from Royal Mail as there was a heart drawn on the back of her Valentine. Her mum recently wrote off her motor. But daughter hasn't a license so she takes ownership.

What muppet would send a marked card to a child unable to drive? Her mother perhaps?

Drawing of Kermit The Frog's head.

Nurse Betty

You mean I wasn't the only one

TO SEND MYSELF A CARD?

 

IMMENSE GRATITUDE

I would like to stupendously thank all the magnificent damsels that sent me Valentines cards this year. 'Twas an utter delight to receive such wonderful garlands and chocolatey comestibles.

As a thank you, I would like to invite you all to a wine and cheese evening at my palatial abode, where I shall charm you all with romantic ballads on my ukelele and recite the most idyllic and utopian poetry.

Twiglets optional.

The Brigadier

OK, own up —

WHO'S ENCOURAGING HIM? EH?