The Mega-Zine Museum
January 9, 2002
FLUFFY THE EVIL ONE WLW — where were those Christmas cards you said you would send us on Vegetable Revolution? I think someone has been fibbing to you guys, but thank you all for yours x.
SOAP SUD The door from our kitchen to the garage squeaks when it closes. It squeaks the tune of Coronation Street. Cool, huh? Cool, and somewhat bizarre!
THE DIM GIRL FROM THE MOLEHOLE The day I become sane is the day you can milk a parrot. Don't try this at home, kids.
FIGHT, FIGHT!
I dread to think what would happen if the Possum and that Brigadier chap square off. Maybe it would just be a mass of post and Bon Jovi, all mangled up into a big ball of ugliness.
Now. Man with the Golden Bun and Dark Grey Wolfie boy, there's a fight with comedy value. Handbags and the gladrags indeed.
Kellogulation
Now now, goodwill to all men...
AND WOLVES, AND POSSUMS, ETC ETC
STUPID QUESTIONS
- Why do dogs hate you blowing in their faces, but stick their heads out of car windows?
- Whose cruel idea was it to have an "s" in the word lisp?
- If vampires have no reflection, why is their hair so tidy?
- How do the people who write the dictionary know that all the words are spelt correctly?
The Little Silver Moonbaby
Dunno, I've no idea, none of 'em,
CAN'T HELP AT ALL, SOZ AND ALL THAT
'ZINERS,
Does anyone else love oatcakes? I like them with cheese, or marmalade, or just margarine.
I sure do like them... if only they didn't put the holes in them so the margarine soaks through and goes all over you.
Frank The Potato
Mmmmmmm... oatcakes
OH YES INDEED, LOVE 'EM
WLW AND 'ZINERS,
I have decided to send in my entry to poetry corner. It's called "Snow':
Snow is white and snow is bright
Snow makes everything all right
You can do lots of things with snow
Like build a snowman and watch him grow
I know it's not very good, but they will get better.
Pink Sock
It's not THAT bad — I mean, it's not
AWARD-WINNING, BUT IT'S PASSABLE
WLW,
You obviously had no idea that anyone would take you seriously when you revealed yourself as the lead singer of Iceland's top indie band.
However, I am a fan of the band who have this dubious honour and I can, therefore, reveal that you are Jonsi Birgisson from Sigur Ros!
Maybe your new job would explain the lack of new material. When's the next album coming out, anyway?
Socialist Guerwilla
Oh blimey, there's always one!
NEW ALBUM'S OUT... ER... MARCH
TA-DA!
I'm back! Not that I wont away, just wanted to make an entrance. But anyway, I haven't written in for about three weeks!
Since then, 'Zine has been over-run by Kellogulation and that boy who likes to pretend he drinks port. Steps have split up and we've had Christmas.
Yes, it's been a sad ol' few months but now I'm here, everyone can rejoice and sing songs of fun and glee.
Lemming Curd
Speaking of fun and glee —
S CLUB MAY BE SPLITTING TOO!
TURNIP SURPRISE
About two weeks ago, in your list of things to do when you are bored, you said that you pretend to be an aardvark. This is incredibly insulting to me because I myself am an aardvark.
My life isn't boring, in fact, I find eating ants all day and pondering over why my nose is so long totally invigorating.
You may find this hard to believe, but have you ever tried being an aardvark? Well?
Anxious Aardvark
My guess would be no — the Turnip
HAS NEVER BEEN AN AARDVARK
