The Mega-Zine Museum
December 14—15, 2001
LADY PATRICIA OF THE GARDEN SHED WLW, what colour are your eyes? Mine are green. Brown, thank you for asking.
MILTON AND ME I think I fancy Elijah Wood. Is there something I can take for this? Yes — a large dose of Matt Damon, twice a day, every day should help.
MORTAL WOMBAT I've remembered who I hate more than Limp Bizkit and Kid Rock... Simply Red! A wise choice, my little marsupial. I think Mick Hucknall and Satan are possibly the same person.
SANTA CLAUS
There are four main stages in life:
- You believe in Santa Claus
- You don't believe in Santa Claus
- You are Santa Claus
- You look like Santa Claus.
Personally, I'm not past stage 1. Huh? What do you mean he's not real...?
Le Enfant Terrible
Of course he's real — don't you let
ANYONE TELL YOU OTHERWISE
THE UNITED TRUTH
OK, here are some more things to do in Leicester! Woohoo!
- Marvel at the selection of crappy statues, such as the knitting woman, and the sport (shudder) statue!
- Go to the the market and ride the moving walkway — over and over!
- Talk to me — please! I have no friends or life... I'm desperate!
Secluded Rainbow
I'm growing to love Leicester
MORE AND MORE EACH DAY
WLW
I think that there should be more poetry on 'Zine, so let me start the ball rolling:
There once was a man from Leeds
Who swallowed a packet of seeds
It soon came to pass
He was covered in grass
And couldn't stand up for the weeds!
The Cornflake Kid
Yes — it's not quite
WHAT I HAD IN MIND, BUT STILL...
PSYCHO LITTLE VOICES
I, too, share your addiction! But only for Spearmint Polos. They are the superior flavour.
I once had five packets and ate them all in an hour! Unfortunately, I am addicted to Boosts as well! Maybe we should just start a support group fou all people who have weird addictions?
Must dash now, I hear there's a new delivery of sweets at the Post Office.
Exhilarated Obstruction
Mmmmm... Boost! Peanut Boost! Mmmmm...
SORRY, MILES AWAY THERE
OI, WLW
Why do I always get put on page 8 of 'Zine? It's getting annoying. Put me on a different page.
And, seeing as everyone else is getting a picture, I want one, too. Because I'm feeling all nostalgic, can I have that yellow blob that used to be in the top corner?
Pablo Marmite
Page 6 AND a lovely drawing of the M1,
JUST PRIOR TO JUNCTION 12. HAPPY?
POKEMON
I made it my business to watch at least one episode of this cartoon, so I could form an opinion. I don't see how little kids are supposed to understand what is going on, because I had no idea. Maybe that's the point?
Maybe you are supposed to sit there and try to figure out why Pikachu hasn't evolved into some 20ft beast, or why he hasn't found happiness because of the lack of Pikachu buddies.
I don't know, maybe I'm getting old.
Lemming Curd
No, it's not you, it really IS tosh —
BIZARRE TOSH AT THAT
LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME!
I bought myself a splendid deerstalker hat to wear engagingly on my cranium the other day.
I must say that wearing it, together with smoking my pipe and partaking of a tipple of port, I do look quite the dashing and awesome cavalier.
You should all seek a poster and decorate your unsightly bedroom walls with my glorious and imposing visage.
The Brigadier
OK — who wants to see the Brigadier
FIRST THING IN THE MORNING? ANYONE?
