The Mega-Zine Museum
March 16—17, 2001
MISS WORLD Do all you stamp addicts know what they put on the back of stamps to make them stick when you lick them? Yes, aardvark wee. It's true!
POLYTHENE Why did the chewing gum cross the road? Wait for it... because it was stuck to the chicken's foot! Baboom! Thank you, my name's Polythene, you've been a wonderful audience, goodnight!
SIR WHENCE PITCHFORK WLW — how come yow like Depeche Mode but not Kid A? Er... you've listened to both, right?
ABOUT ME
| Likes: | Smiths, Belle and Sebastian, Manics (sorry!), Sheffield Wednesday FC and golden buns, of course! |
| Dislikes: | Nothing, I love everyone! |
| Fave 'Ziners: | Me and Jarvis T Raven |
| Looks: | I look like that really sexy bloke that all the girls fancy — I think his name is... The Man With The Golden Bun! |
The Man With The Golden Bun
The Manics AND Sheffield Wednesday?
I FEEL PITY BEYOND BELIEF!
PERSECUTE ME IF YOU WILL
I don't care what anyone else thinks about me. I am a male goth and I don't wear hooded jumpers. But I do wear black lipstick, nail polish and dresses.
Say what you will, I am proud to be myself and not what everyone else thinks I should be.
What happened to the happy 'Zine where all the freaks got on with each other?
Savage Cabbage
Sadly, those days appear to be
ALL BUT A DISTANT MEMORY
A THING I'VE NOTICED RECENTLY
The Teletext music pages contain a lot of messages from Lee, Barnsley, who appears to be a militant Def Leppard fan. I've gathered a few facts.
His name is Lee. He lives in Barnsley. He is possibly the last surviving Def Leppard fan in the UK.
Lee — if you're reading this, and you probably are, there are organisations that can help.
Parsley Possum
There are? Crikey —
WHO'D BE A SAMARITAN?
THE WEAKEST LINK
I'll tell you what's really scary about this show — how high Ms Robinson's necklines are getting. They started out normally, but were half way up her throat the last time I watched.
She'll be peeping over the top of her collar in a couple of weeks' time if she's not careful!
Cue the goodbye jokes...
Sweet Sister Of Night
The virtual Anne Robinson is excellent
THOUGH, DON'T YOU THINK? GOODBYE!
HANDS UP TO PARSLEY POSSUM!
At last somebody has mentioned Incubus on these pages! Not only are they one of the most original bands ever, but they have mentioned fungus on several occasions. And Mike Einziger's cute.
Expect more of my ramblings at a later date...
Viva Jawa
I await with baited breath...
NO, REALLY
WLW
I have unravelled one of the greatest secrets ever: why do I always look stupid in school photographs?
After months of painstaking research and much thought, I've reached two ground-breaking conclusions:
- School photographers are the employees of Satan.
- I have an incredibly stupid face.
Secluded Rainbow
So it was research time well spent —
MY TIP? GO SICK ON SCHOOL PHOTO DAY
I FEEL REALLY TIRED THESE DAYS
Help me with this, people. I am not a trendy or a freak. I listen to Radiohead but I like house.
I dress smartly during the day but I wear skate labels other times. I like underground hip-hop but not Limp Bizkit.
I talk to full-on trendies at school but disassociate myself with nerds.
Who am I? The first of a new breed.
Changeling
Confused I would say —
INDIVIDUAL BUT CONFUSED!
