The Mega-Zine Museum

March 3, 2001

SECLUDED RAINBOW WLW — what do you like best, daddy or chips? Chips!

PURPLE FAIRY DUST The Magic Roundabout is way better than Digimon or Pokemon. "Time for bed," said WLW.

GREEDY SLEEPER I wish I had a Kryptonite cross — then I could keep both Dracula AND Superman away. And if you dipped it in mushroom soup, you wouldn't see me for dust either!

BECAUSE I CAN

Parsley Possum

What do you look like?

THAT'S WHAT I WANT TO KNOW!

WLW

You printed my letter... thank you. But you neglected to show my sarcasm.

I'll say it loud and proud: I AM A MANICS FAN!!!

You may crucify me at will, though I believe my blocked account on Napster 'cos of bad early Manics files is justice enough (insert laughter here).

Sheep In Wolf's Clothing

Justice indeed —

LET THAT BE A LESSON TO YOU

THIS MAKES NO SENSE

The thing I was thinking about last night was that ultimately nothing makes sense.

For something to make sense, other people must understand it. No-one understands everything about anyone, therefore nothing makes sense.

International Man Of Misery

PS: WLW, I know your real name and I will reveal it unless I am paid one meeeeeeeelion dollars.

Used notes do?

WITH DAVORD'S FACE ON OR WITHOUT?

DAISY'S TEATS

Where oh where have Daisy's teats gone? They've now been replaced by those dull little boxes and I feel that this is an infringement of cow rights.

What about all of Teletext's cow viewers? Cows have feelings too, you know!

Unless... was Daisy charged with indecent exposure?

WigWam Girl

Sadly, she was. It got very messy,

THE PAPERS GOT INVOLVED...

FIVE MADE UP FACTS THAT SHOULD BE WELL KNOWN:

1. The average trendy's brain is 7% bigger than the average outcast's!
2. 99% is full of fresh air!
3. It takes WLW an average of 3 weeks to read his/her/its inbox!
4. I like using exclamation marks!
5. I'm not actually a midget! I'm 6'2"!

Tap Dancing Midget On Stilts

Midget: you are the

MOST SARCASTIC 'ZINER... GOODBYE

WHY I'M NOT A MEMBER OF S CLUB 7:

1. I have opinions which aren't those of my record company.
2. I still have a soul.
3. To my knowledge, I am not related to Satan.
4. I have an extensive false teeth collection.
5. I am, in fact, Jon Bon Jovi.

Guacamole

But I know for a fact that Paul S Club

HAS COLLECTED FALSE TEETH FOR YEARS

WHY PARSLEY IS THE BEST AND (2ND) WORST 'ZINER:

He is blatantly playing you for fools! His comments are so clearly designed to antagonise you suckers that it's funny to see how indignantly you respond.

But, Parsley, it's starting to get boring and you've made enough enemies.

As for the worst: is there a Gutless in the house?

Infernal Biscuit Monitor

I say we get Parsley and Gutless to

WRESTLE IN JELLY — NO HOLDS BARRED

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