The Mega-Zine Museum
January 16, 2001
RESIDENT WEIRDO Zippy and Bungle went to the jungle... nah, better stop. It's far too rude. I think that's wise.
LADY OF THE DEAD I've noticed that most 'Ziners write about their love for one another. I'm starting to feel like the girl who came on someone else's date. Anyone interested in me? I am, poppet!
GLITTER JUNKIE Broken Bubbles dear — is it true that you're from Gloucester? Please say you are — I think you're great. He is? I mean, he is!
NINJA COW
'Ziners writing to B*ckch*t would be like Thom Yorke writing songs for Westlife or S Crud 7.
If you like B*ckch*t so much then write in, but that's one plughole through which I, for one, do not intend to sink, the apotheosis of mediocrity.
The Psychedelic Gloom
You're a cheeky lad, you are!
ONE 'PLUGHOLE' INDEED — NAUGHTY
BURGER QUEEN LIBERTINE
Are you insane? Where "The Nightmare Before Christmas" is concerned, the resident sauce has to be the Bogey Man. That gravelly voice, that quiff he smooths back so seductively... not to mention the gambling den.
But, since he was shredded (sniff), I have turned my attentions to South Park's Satan. He'll never leave Saddam, but a girl can dream...
Mad Mongolian Mongoose VII
Whatever happened to the old days,
WHEN GIRLIES FANCIED SOOTY?
'ZINERS
On Monday, January 1, I discovered Megazine and, to my surprise, I enjoyed it — far better than the usual junk.
I find that 95% of the stuff on Mega-zine puzzles me, but who says mystery is a bad thing? Not me, 'cos the universe and its inhabitants are a mystery, and the result of mystery is pure enchantment.
She... The Essence Of Purity
Usual junk? How dare...
OH, WE'RE TALKING B*CKCH*T, RIGHT?
WLW
Happy to see a little strangeness and opinion (apart from love or hate MSP) creep back onto these pages.
Aquafresh is a bit scary and falsely advertised. And poetry is brilliant, if you read the right poets — Plath, Duffy, Larkin. Anyway, I'm scared... I came up to my room and the toilet flushed, but no-one is in. I'm off to investigate.
Miss Tristesse
It'll be Atomic Kitten — their
BEST WORK COMES FROM THE TOILET
IT'S GREAT BEING MENTIONED
It (Broccoli) is really great (Twix McGoo) being mentioned (Sweet Poison) by other 'Ziners (Miss World) who think (Parsley Possum) that I'm good (Danger Mouse).
I wish (Fairy Cake) that I could (Morgo The Evil Fumigator) mention (Miss Tristesse) some other (Broken Bubbles) great 'Ziners (Black Widow) but there just isn't (Plughole Fantasy) enough room (WLW).
Fluffy The Evil One
Oooh, saved yerself right at the end —
THOUGHT YOU'D FORGOTTEN ME!
THE 'ZINER PROFILE THINGY
Just wondering, at 5'1", am I the smallest 'Ziner? I probably am, since I'm one of the smallest girls I know. Go on, mock me all you like. I blame my chain-smoking parents.
While I'm here, I'll finish the picture by telling you that I'm also Irish, have blonde and pink hair, blue eyes, nose and lip piercings, with a passion for the '60s, Placebo, Radiohead, JJ72, disco and classical music.
redpixie
You could be the smallest — though I'm
STILL CONVINCED FLUFFY'S ONLY 4'11"
WLW
No introductions are necessary,
you know me already.
I have always been here,
manipulating your fear
AND controlling your emotions,
with my corrupt potions.
Say hello to me
and wave goodbye to individuality.
The Corporate Manifesto
Thanks for that —
VERY JOLLY AND MOST ENLIGHTENING
