The Mega-Zine Museum
January 15, 2001
SILVAN DRACONIS The emergency number, 999, turned upside down reads 666. Weird, huh? My gast is flabbered!
SECLUDED RAINBOW How the hell did Arsenal manage to beat the fantastic Leicester City? I'm gutted. Everyone's beating the "fantastic Leicester City"!
LADY OF THE DEAD Physics states that the colour black attracts heat, so therefore wearing nothing but black should ensure I stay warm. Guess what? It doesn't work! Staying in does.
HEY WLW!
Right, I wanna open a debate. It's a Muse vs Radiohead thing.
My mates are arguing. One says Radiohead have lost their edge on Kid A and Muse are far better (now). The other says Radiohead are, and always will be, the best band ever.
Oh, and the guy with the short pink hair? You sound cool (please tell me you paint your nails black!)
Babe vs Universe
In my not-so-humble opinion...
THEY'RE BOTH DULL! HOPE THIS HELPS
A 'ZINE TRIP TO COVENTRY?
That is such a good idea! We could start with a greasy fry-up at Buttons Cafe, then maybe pretend to be townies and hang around outside JD Sports and shout at people. And we could finish up fighting outside Generations Nightclub!
Whaddaya say, WLW? Everyone's invited except Gutless Wonder.
Parsley Possum
It sounds delightful, but I think I'm
WORMING MY CAT ON THAT DAY
SNOWMANROBOT
You wear pyjamas? Cool! I don't know any boys who wear pyjamas. What kind do you wear? Are they ironic? I have ironic pyjamas. They are blue with white clouds, with the words "I'm in heaven" on them.
Your letter didn't really answer a lot, but that's OK 'cos I find that most boys don't say much anyway!
Fairy Cake
Except the cocky ones on Popstars —
SOMEONE SHUT THEM UP... PLEASE!
CHEERS SILVAN DRACONIS!
At last someone is giving bassists credit! As one myself, I totally respect and idolise the likes of Flea from the Chili Peppers and the wicked guy from One Minute Silence.
Not enough people give us the credit we deserve because they think we take the easy way out instead of playing lead.
I love my bass and, luckily, my band let me do wicked solos.
Little Miss Metalhead
Bassist? But you're a bird, surely?
HA HA HA HA... WELL, IT IS MONDAY
BURGER QUEEN LIBERTINE
You have truly won my heart. Tim Burton's A Nightmare Before Christmas is amazing and very special. Jack Skellington, who is so poetic, sees things in a wonderful and delightful way.
Escape with me to Hallowe'en Town where I will read you my book of poetry and we will live forever in that frightfully charming house of Jack's.
And The Ass Saw The Angel
Oooh, I smell romance in the air...
SHOULD I BUY A NEW HAT?
'ZINERS
It's time we tipped our hats to another one of our planet's unsung heroes — that's right, the guy who invented the straw.
Anyone who invents something that allows you to drink fluids out of a cup without having to lift your hands deserves a pat on the back.
So I am able to do lots of other things while drinking... yo-yoing, for example.
Voice Of The Voiceless
And the guy who invented clingfilm —
QUITE BRILLIANT!
'ZINE ANTHEM
I suggest we have Wait And Bleed by Slipknot. This is because I have to bite my toenails whilst I'm waiting for 'Zine to update because I have nothing better to do with my time.
Sometimes, though, I get through my toenails and start to bite my skin. This results in me bleeding.
The Guy Who Makes Sense Of Nonsense
Aaah, suddenly it all becomes clear —
BUT NO... NO SLIPKNOT THANK YOU
