Mega-Zine
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January 7—8, 2000

LITTLE MISS BLOODBATH Best present ever — a furby called Joey. He can sing, dance and eat. Wait till it sings and dances in the middle of the night... and you can't turn it off!

PLUGHOLE FANTASY I spent the last hours of the Millennium drinking as much coffee as I could manage. You certainly know how to live.

CAPITALIST WITH A CAUSE WLW stands for White legged Wodent — WLW is a hamster! Secret's out, I'll never again be able to walk down the street without being recognised.

 

'ZINERS,

I never go down the 'Zine plughole, for I am a man living on the edge, like the Millennium Dome, big, strong and hairy, like some sort of big left-wing transformer.

The Jacobean Skate Punk From The Devil's Toilet.

I think that's what they call

FREE ASSOCIATION

 

WLW,

Get off your gluteus maximus and do some work will ya?

What's all this luv stuff, huh? These pages should be censored — violence and bad language are acceptable but love?

Love is for weak people. It degrades women and deranges men. Self-love is the most honourable office.

I'm nearly 19, yet I don't need a lover. I just need a soulmate.

Lithium

A "soulmate" sounds dangerously close

TO SOPPY LOVE-SPEAK IF YOU ASK ME

 

WLW,

I have just escaped from a bizarre Zine militia who go by the name of Sarfines. They believe (wrongly) that pilchards are inferior and must be exterminated.

They tortured me with Cliff Richard records and videos of This Morning and Delia Smith. They are vicious.

They have Barry Manilow CDs and Come Dancing videos and they're not afraid to use them.

Sinister Tree Spirit

I'm with you on Sir Cliff

BUT LEAVE BAZZA OUT OF IT!

 

REVOL, LOVER,

Never in my 16.59 years of existence have I encountered such a bizarre collection of rants and assorted verbal dribblings.

What's the deal with all you mad folk thinking that the new Millennium's beginning is 2000? Ignorants! It's 2001.

The Dark Jester

Could be, but

YOU MISSED A GREAT PARTY