The Mega-Zine Museum
October 18, 1999
A BOY CALLED RITA Let us not be ashamed — we are freaks and proud of it! I luv yu Esmerelda!
MASTER OF PUPPETS Is it just me or do other people blow their noses on their socks? Yeah, but I don't put them back on! Ew!
MAGNETIC SLUG WLW, they say flattery gets you nowhere but... you're the best! Now will you print my letter? No, but I'll print this bit just to bug yer!
DEAR WELSH WORLD
It's a sunny day. Birds are singing, trees are dancing, warm colours are all around. Fireflies zoom happily. Buzz, my pretty insects, buzz!
And then...
It's Garfy. Like chocolate in my stomach, he just fits in perfectly.
Mr Garfy. Wobble.
Fluorine IV (a self confessed Garfy Junky)
Somebody's
GOT IT BAAAAAAAAAAAD!
'ZINERS: DEFINITELY DON'T FALL IN LOVE WITH 6TH FORMERS...
I look at him, admiring. I love him from afar. I get excited when I see him — as though he were a star.
I love everything about him, his glasses, hair and clothes. I love him from his beautiful head right down to his toes.
I do not know his name yet, and strangers though we are, I saw him last Sunday afternoon, with his mum in Potter's Bar.
The Alienated Fishfinger
Ah, the ancient love song
OF UNREQUITED LOVE!
TWISTIKAT
I live in a world full of twisted plastic trees, bubble gum skies and ironing board pavements.
I hide underneath the furniture and infest you with my crying eyes. I came in filthy last night and last week tripped you over.
What are you going to do about it?
Feed me, please. And leave off the flea spray!
Haemophiliac Kitten
MEEE-OW!
'ZINERFOLK... PILCHARD!!
OK, I admit it. I was that boy: I was the boy who cried pilchard.
Walking down the street one day, minding my own business, I felt the sudden urge to shout pilchard. So I gave in. All of a sudden... absolutely nothing happened!
I'm such a fool. It won't happen again — I promise.
The Psychedelic Gloom
Woe betide the day a man can say
PILCHARD AT WILL TO ANY PASSER BY!
