The Mega-Zine Museum
February 20, 1999
AGEING LOTHARIO I have to share this piece of advice that the Inuit (Eskimo) people pass on from generation to generation: DON'T EAT YELLOW SNOW! And why would that be, pray tell?
RANDOM GULP Wash your hands, you don't know where they've been. I know exactly where my hands have been, thank you!
SHADE'S SHADOW As I walk down the street I avert my eyes - not at the sight of the homeless but at the horror of my own greed. Why not do some Cheridee... mate?
BLONDE BUT NOT DUMB
How are you not dumb if you say pizza is better than hamburgers? You are either dumb or erm... dumb.
Because hamburgers rule! Plus they are so juicy and tasty and... need I go on?
So wise up and eat grease!
Kiss Kiss
Venus Fly Trap
You're not kissing me with your
LIPS DRIPPING IN ANIMAL FAT
FELLOWLESS 'ZINERS,
I may only be young but blokes: who needs 'em? I mean, if they can send one man to the moon, why not the rest of them?
And anyway, why test on poor defencless animals when you can use my boyfriend?
All women out there should get a gingerbread man. He's sweet, quiet and if he gives you any grief, you can bite his head off.
The not-too-twisted Dancing Baby
I think we can all guess
WHO'S JUST BEEN DUMPED!
"I pick Sarah,"
"I pick John,"
"I pick Katie,"
"I pick Elvis,"
Silence
(½ hour later)
Teacher: "Someone has to pick her."
Silence
Welcome me, 'Ziners (or humour me), we are all in life's boat together.
Let me in, WLW, the money's in the post.
tHe woN hOo cuLdN't spelxxx
I was never picked first, either,
PERHAPS THAT'S WHY I'M BITTER
JACOBEAN BOUNTY HUNTER
Thanks. Next time I'm in London, I'll look for your shop. My uncle lives there, so I go there quite often.
Sorry about shortening your name, but I couldn't be bothered to write it all out.
Captain Fish
I can see this is the start of a
BEAUTIFUL FRIENDSHIP... AAHHHHH!
