The Mega-Zine Museum
February 13, 1999
NAFF NYMPH Am I famous yet? Am I, am I? Well, all right then, maybe!
RANDOM GULP Is it so wrong to name your fish after Alice Cooper? Answer me that. Yes, you should call it "fish" from Marillion, far more apt!
PC STU I'm in love with the real Lara Croft that writes to 'Zine. I'll do anything you ask, anything at all! Get to the back of the queue, mate!
UNSOLVED MYSTERIES
- What your parents (sorry, I mean tooth fairies) do with your teeth when they fall out.
- Whether WLW is male, female, both or neither.
- What kind of person would sit down and write nursery rhymes like Hickory Dickory Dock?
- Why my brother wees on the toilet seat when the middle is much bigger.
- Who invented toilet brushes and underwear and why?
- The total IQ of all 'Ziners added together (estimated at -900).
The Mouse in Cat's Pyjamas.
You have obviously got far too
MUCH TIME ON YOUR HANDS!
A POEM FOR VALENTINE'S DAY
He loves me.
She loves me not.
Lustless devotion
for what we have got.
The day cometh
Before us marked bare.
No one body loves me
But then I don't care.
I'd just like to say I'm not in love and I'm never getting married.
Atomic
Not really in the spirit of
IT ALL, ARE YOU? - GOOD!!!
FOR LOVE
For love I stabbed a pair of tweezers in my hand, but he didn't pull them out for me.
For love I kept back the tears of pain, but he just laughed.
For love I had the injection in my arm, but he did not tell me I'd be allergic to it.
For love a tennis ball-sized lump appeared on my arm, but he wasn't near enough to notice it.
Now I'm left with my tennis ball but no racket to play with.
Now I have given up my love forever.
Kula
Love's a terrible racket eh?
BLUBBER BLUBBER SNIFF SNIFF!!!!!!
BLUE RAISIN
Easy! "I walk in the air between the rain through myself and back again, Where? I don't know" is from "Round Here" by the excellent Counting Crows.
At last, somebody else who appreciates this excellent band.
OK, try this:
"...and remember being small, playing under the table and dreaming..."
Love,
Angel of the Silences
You win a small paper bag of
MOULDY PEAR DROPS I FOUND IN MY CAR!
