The Mega-Zine Museum
October 21, 1998
SHE Did you know dolphins have to think about breathing? Sounds a bit like blondes! I often forget to put trousers on in the morning! Very embarassing.
SACRILEGIOUS SHE SPIDER Stereotypes: If I put a gold hoop round my head and wore a billowing white gown, would you all assume that I was an angel? No, but if you floated on a cloud we might.
JACOBEAN BOUNTY HUNTER I'm not a loon, I just live on a spoon! But would you have a life, if you happened to sit on a knife?
OUR SURVEY SAID,
Take a couple of the:
Thickest, untalented, dumbest, sad, unrythmical, manufactured, unfortunate, unmusical, no hope in hell, misguided, used, publicity-seeking, lonely, tarty absolute fools from around Britain, and you can create a chart-topping pop band to make money out of four-year-olds.
The Babazoo Bird On a Hill in Tibet
Yes, but it's a bit of a mouthful
ON THE CURRICULUM VITAE!
TIME FOR SOMETHING TOPICAL...
We have digital watches, digital music systems (CD players), digital phones (mobiles), digital pets (Tamagotchis), digital money (credit cards), and now digital television shoved in our faces.
What next? Digital houses? A digital aristocracy? Digital sex?
Join me in my quest against this evil digital invasion. The war has started.
The Alternative Thinker
Not very Alternative thinking to me.
DIGITAL IS THE WAY OF THE FUTURE!
DEAR 'ZINERS,
Listen carefully and you will hear the stars sneeze.
Look closely and you'll see the moon bleed.
Smell closely and you'll wish you hadn't.
Frogzilla (made of rubber)
Yes, but think a lot and
GET A HEADACHE.
DEAR 'ZINERS,
Oh, how I hate Sundays,
Bored with Songs of Praise,
Seems to sum up the day,
Every Sunday,
I read the 'Zine at 4,
Sometimes it's a bore,
Or I don't understand it,
And I feel such a twit,
But now I know why,
Everyone's bored when the week says 'bye.
The Swindled One
Songs of Praise and a cup of tea
SOUNDS LIKE HEAVEN TO ME!
