The Mega-Zine Museum
June 30, 1998
DEVOTED AQUA FAN I've heard that Aqua appeared on Ricki Lake in the US. If this is true, will we see that show over here? It can't be true — even Ricki's guests aren't that weird!
LITTLE OWL When somebody tosses a coin and shouts "heads" don't try and hit it with your head. It hurts! And if they shout "tails" don't hit it with your tail as that's absolute agony.
THE LITTLE RED-HAIRED GIRL Why do news readers wear such boring clothes? To complement what they are talking about?
DEAR 'ZINE,
Last year I had a pie which I had never tasted before.
Every day for two months I had that lovely, sweet, yummy pie until one day I lost it.
Before I had discovered that pie my life felt complete but, now I know what I am missing, I feel empty.
Rialta.
At least we now know the answer to
WHO ATE ALL THE PIES!
FELLOW RODENTS OF 'ZINE,
Here are some rodent rules:
- Don't insult a cat.
- When in your hamster ball, look demented.
- Never tangle with a hoover.
- Don't put chocolate in your cheeks.
- Always bite future boy/girlfriends of your master — eventually they will thank you for it.
- Escape! Follow these simple rules and you will prosper.
Fuzzy Hamster.
And never follow a man with a pipe
DOWN TO THE RIVER!
DEAR 'ZINE,
I've been reading this page for two days, and I haven't written in yet.
So what did the whole nation think of that maths GCSE on June 9?
I thought it was as easy as getting food poisoning in Egypt, with the exception of question 18(b).
Species 8472 (ish).
You've been reading this for two days?
YOU SHOULD GET OUT MORE!
WLW ET 'ZINERS,
Don't you think the phone is the biggest rip-off ever?
I mean you don't even get to see the person you're talking to. You get hardly any reception, and you have to pay for the privilege.
Surely it's better to just go round to somebody's house to talk. And that's free!
Eau Rouge.
Face to face contact?
IT MAY JUST CATCH ON
