The Mega-Zine Museum
March 2, 1998
UFO Thanks for the compliment! It's nice to get noticed as I'm on this distant planet. By the way what does AWWBTFFIC mean (or is it some kind of secret code). Wouldn't it be odd if it was some kind of secret Toad!
BOBBLE HAT How much do you think of yourself oh Mighty Eyebrow? NO female is scared of you, and NO males love you. Get a grip and quit thinking so much about yourself. You might also think about changing your name. How about changing to the Mighty Nostril?
ANDERSON'S ZEN MOMENT
The skin is cut,
the new lips run,
like salt water across her face.
Trembling hands take shards of glass,
to drink away the weight and pain.
Ethereal deception leaves,
her grounded by the new divide;
Realisation through exaustion:
The promised moment has arrived.
The pressure to rest.
The power only to sleep.
Tiresias
So is this poem based around the
FAMOUS ZANS CHRISTIAN ANDERSEN??
DEAR 'ZINSTERS
Think of anything you want. Go on. Picture everything you have ever desired, Can you see it? I can see you salivating over all your lustful thoughts. So what do you want?
The point of this venture is that anybody who wants something must be, by definition, unhappy with what they already have. This is why we all get sad sometimes, isn't it?
Broken Circles
Your just chasing your tail. Don't
KEEP GOING AROUND IN CIRCLES!!
FELLOW 'ZINERS
It is time for WLW to be replaced by me. Why I hear you scream? Because I have discovered the illness that causes human beings to become 'fashion victims'.
I call it 'low self-esteem'. These 'individuals' are too scared to be themselves and so become a clone of their peers.
Wu-tang Clan
Replace me! I think you're a bit
TANGY FOR MOST PEOPLE'S TASTE!!
DEAR 'ZINERS
I wonder how many of today's 'Ziners remember what it was like when my stunning letters graced the 'Zine pages all the time.
'Zine then had wit and sarcasm, the pages were viewed by 100 million viewers daily, each viewer earned £100,000 a year and owned five cars.
There was world peace, no famine and no Noel Edmonds.
Artist Formerly Known as Gonzo
I'm afraid to tell you you're wrong!
THAT WAS LAST WEEK!!