Mega-Zine
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January 19, 1998

ROBOKID Miss Hoover: I have a problem, can you help me? I can never match up all the odd socks. It's a mystery to me how it happens or where they all come from. Blowed if I know.

SPELLBOUND I have a question: If I'm not going to San Francisco, can I still wear some flowers in my hair? Peace. Okay, seeing as you asked so nicely.

FUZZY HAMSTER Dear Baby Bell, Small cheese, small brain, small letters. It figures. And your excuse?

 

DEAR TWIN TURBO UPRIGHT

Thank you for proving that there is still intelligence on Planet Boy.

Hopefully, we can become a true couple and take on the cleaning appliance market together!

If you're into all things kitschy and kooky - you're the guy for me; it's what's inside that counts.

Miss Hoover

Is that something all soft and gooey -

OR JUST A LOT OF FLUFF?

 

TO 'ZINE

4 facts the world should know.

  1. People who write to the 'Zine should only write optimistic letters.
  2. Posters of guys that are supposed to look sexy really looked bored.
  3. The Spice Girls can't really sing. They hire good mixers though.
  4. Transvestites make better comedians.

The God of paperclips and biros that don't work.

A fountain pen and a stapler

WOULD BE OF MORE USE, METHINKS

 

'ZINERS,

Did anyone see the Blue Peter with a section devoted to fashionable bog seats?

Between them, Stuart and Richard turned a usually squeaky clean show into a hilariously funny, smut filled section!

My fave? A seat encrusted with stars and planets "for budding astronauts who want to make a moon landing".

Richard then proceeded to threaten the nation with a "blast off". Hmmm.

The Impossibly Princess

Wow, and all with a washing-up liquid

BOTTLE AND SOME STICKY BACK PLASTIC!

 

DEAR WLW,

If I'm so boring - why do you keep printing my letters? Actually, I feel happy and glittery.

Glittery feelings of being in flight -
Flying like fairies, I feel quite right
Light as a feather caught on a breeze
Up in the clouds and over the trees
I am a bird and you are all ants
I'm thinking nice thoughts. Oh - Nicky Wire's pants.

Bye! I'm off to the library!

Bored Baby (who's not bored at all)

Glad to see you fly high baby

BUT KEEP YOUR MIND OFF THE UNDERWEAR