The Mega-Zine Museum
December 17, 1997
GODZUKI Stars are just dots in an enormous astral colour-blindness test, and we humans see the colours! Which means that we're all astrally colourblind! Eek! You're dotty.
PSYCHOPATH WITH PERFECT TEETH My name is NOT Martin! Either my handwriting has been recognised as that of my occasional other pseudonym - Martin Phone - or the people at the Void have been on the funny fungi again! Foiled!
99% PROOF Last night I got proofed. Why must I pay for having a good time. Ouch.
DEAR 'ZINE
I had a job stacking fruit and vegetables but I was dismissed for having long hair.
Now I've got a job working behind a bar - there is no mould, insects or rotting produce and I get paid better.
My message to job seekers therefore is to avoid supermarket work unless you're a robot.
Broken Circles, dispenser of valuable advice.
There aren't any safe ways to earn a
BOB. I'M NOT TAKING THE METAL MICKEY
OKAY, FINE!...
Enough of the bitterness, you want consumer rights? - well all of us are consumers, and you lot at 'Zine HQ are the shop if you like.
When I first read the 'Zine, it was always six pages. Now it's only five.
Service has slipped somewhat over the past 18 months and I feel that the time has come for someone to press for action to be taken, or else some may go to Backchat.
Mr Unreadable
LOOK - you're here to be 'Zine and not
HEARD - EAT THAT! CONSUMER... TUT..
SILVER BULLET
Can't help you I'm afraid. If you can't actually hear the music of the spheres yourself, you could always listen to Holst, or something.
Or else discuss it all with Psycho. He's into all that, I believe. Doctrine of Materialism (and misogyny as a side-kick). By the time you've bored one another to tears you should be ready for just about anything... even TMBGE's Boyfriend!
Ignorance is bliss, they say.
Lady Hysteria, and her faithful servant, Bed-pan
And knowledge is power - and there's
PLENTY OF KNOW-IT-ALLS ON 'ZINE
TO SWEET AND TENDER HOOLIGAN, AND THE REST...
How do mermaids wee? How come moth balls aren't hairy? What does/will WLW do with all the letters we send?
I think that when Mega-zine folds, all the 'Ziners should meet in Manchester, my house, November 5th and make the biggest bonfire ever with the letters that WLW store.
But what about the Emails... how do we burn those? Ah, questions, questions...
Shoplifter of the World (uniting and taking over) stood at cemetery gates
You can do anything you like with them
FIRE'S GOOD. FIRE WORKS FOR ME!
