The Mega-Zine Museum
September 15, 1997
THE PERSON WITH A VERY AMUSING NAME feels nothing but withering contempt for 'ziners out there feverishly scribbling away their lives.
MR FLOPPY orders wired 'Ziners to connect to irc.pi.net or london.uk.eu.undernet.org and join #club140.
EAU ROUGE asks: Time, where are you going? To the cinema. Mmmm, I don't think so. You're off to see WLW aren't you? Admit it! Reverting stuff, eh readers?
BLUE RAISAN dreamed of Will Smith. Zzz.
PEANUTS
A peanut sat on a railroad track,
his heart was all aflutter.
Along came a train - the 9.15;
Toot, toot - peanut butter!
MY DOG
I've got a dog as thin as a rail.
He's got fleas all over his tail.
Every time his tail goes flop,
the fleas on the bottom
all hop to the top.
Dragonflew
I've got a job as WHITE LINE WARRIOR -
FOR THAT FACT I'M SORRIER & SORRIER
SOMETHING THAT GETS ME MAD
The other day we had a plumber in and as I was walking past his bottom crack I said hello. What a cheek (so to speak): he didn't reply.
It's the middle-aged Kevin Pattersons of this world - not the youth - who make this world nasty and ignorant.
Excuse me while I tell my grandma about this plumber. SHE'll sort him out by flushing his head in the loo.
Blue Raisan
The poor man's probably hard of hearing
AS A YOOF YOU SHOULD BE TOLERANT
DEAR PEOPLE WHO WRITE TO 'MATES'
When you say 'reply guaranteed', do you mean 'yes, I will write back', or 'I might write back if I can be bothered or if I fancy you'?
I hate writing to people only to be snubbed. What's the matter with me? Eh? Eh?
Leon Trotsky
It might be that you've been dead ages
OR YOUR SPECS AND BEARD ARE UNCOOL.
GREETINGS 'ZINE
The other day, while being violently sick, I had a vision of the future.
Tony Blair declared the 'Zine to be New Labour's new mantra and promptly won the next 100 elections.
There's only one problem with this prediction; it came after a vision of WLW actually being NICE to a 'ziner. CAN'T be true then.
The Scales of Justice
Cough! Splutter! Biscuit crumbs aflying
WHADDAYA MEAN I'M MEAN TO 'ZINERS?
