The Mega-Zine Museum
June 15, 1997
THE GIRL FORBIDDEN TO GET HER TONGUE PIERCED is thrilled to bits that she's going to see The Prodigy in Chelmsford. She'll have the brightest hair there.
THE UNDERGROUND POTATO MOVEMENT abhors the comments at the bottom of Digitiser about Bamboozle. Yes, UPM, abhor is indeed a word. It means to HATE.
PIG ON THE RAMPAGE asks Surreal Chemist why he doesn't eat his apple cores. There's only a small amount of cyanide in the pips and they taste delish, all almondy and dry.
DEAR 'ZINE
The Premier League is the best league in the world. Here's why:
- Seria A has hooligan problems like we did in the 1980s.
- Spain is dominated by Barcelona and Real Madrid.
- Ajax are losing all their best men.
- It's Rangers Rangers Rangers in Scotland.
- Portuguese football is corrupt.
- The French don't have enough financial muscle.
Mr Unreadable
So the PM is best by default.
GREAT.
OI! WLW!
Just wanted to inject some new blood into Megazine and start a debate: are Hanson better than Manson?
Also, does anyone want to join me on a campaign to ban the use of gel, to stop blokes sticking their hair to their foreheads.
Does anyone know why they do this? Do they think it looks attractive or is it just hormonal?
Girl in love with a bassoon
Bless 'em. It's probably to make the
MOST OF THEIR HAIR WHILE IT'S THERE
SMELLY THINGS ABOUT SUMMER
Getting sunburn waiting for the bus
Frisbee landing in doggy do
Ice-cream melting before you've even started on the flake
People thinking the local tennis courts are Wimbledon
Bright sunshine waking you up Broken sprinklers
Neighbours' barbecue smelling tastier than yours
Remembering how expensive Strawberry Splits are
Fliddy
Good grief! What a misery guts you are.
GO AND LIVE IN A CELLAR OR SOMETHING
'ZINERS!
I want to know:
Why does the weather turn nice when I'm stuck indoors revising?
How did I manage to complete my 2½ hour maths exam in 1½ hours?
Why did it say on the front of my Biology exam "marks will not be deducted for incorrect answers" when I know darn well they will?
Celtic Dragon Warrior
The answer to Q2 is 'cos you're either
SUPER-BAD OR JUST VERY BAD AT MATHS
