The Mega-Zine Museum
June 10, 1997
BITCHY WITCHY I wish that people would stop complaining how bad the 'Zine's got. You've got two choices a) write something decent and improve it, or b) stop reading it. Here here!
SILHOUETTE FROM THE LIGHTER SIDE Ode to a cloud:
Oh little cloud in the sky,
I wonder why you caught my eye,
If you were to fall on me,
I would wear you happily. Wear? But where?
KILLER KITTEN The reason fire engines are red is because red is the colour of danger and fire. Oh, fascinating... yawn.
DEAR 'ZINE
Psychopath with perfect teeth - WE LOVE YOU! We don't care whether you're male or female but we wanna know!
You're always gracing the pages of the 'Zine with your witty comments and questions.
You ask the questions we've always wanted to know but were too scared to ask in case they thought we were psychopaths. But you've saved us!
Can we keep in touch?
Kit, the Bestranged Gifted One and her mate.
Being a psychopath you could probably
STAY IN TOUCH TILL DEATH DO YOU PART
TRILLION'S BEAUTIFUL CHILD
You're a living example that beauty and brains very rarely mix!
But anyway, let's go slowly through your queries:
- Who the hell cares what Clive James said - give me a decent British host any day (if we had one...)
- No Doubt's big hit contains the line "Oh memories, they can be inviting". Ear drops needed maybe?
- DOA stands for Dead on Arrival as WLW (that's White Line Warrior just in case) subtly pointed out.
If you missed any of that, wait for about 5 pages and it will return.
Dick Tator & The Spud Army
TBC - Go and get your jacket. You'll
NOT VISIT A SPUD-U-LIKE AGAIN, EH?
DEAR MEGAZINE
I've made these anagrams 'cos I've nothing better to do. The first person who writes in with the correct answers must be very clever.
- Sentence: BEAT RETURNED MATHS
- Sentence: BOB IBI'S GOT A CAGE
- Famous Person: BROOM, TRIBE M
- Famous Person: NAE SNED OUT VEIN
- Could be anything!: WRITER I RAIN WHOLE
Whoever gets number 2 must a) be Einstein or b) be called PC CD-Rom, 16 Gb RAM, MMX Technology!
Red Chipolata
Rearrange what follows to make a phrase
I'VE THINGS GOT TO BETTER DO!
IN REPLY TO BLUE RAISAN
Go for it, Gal! My best mate is 18 and engaged to a 28-year-old man. They have been dating for ages and are very happy.
IT CAN WORK!
Older men are more intelligent and refined. The sexiest man I know is 53. He has scruffy grey hair, talent and a wicked sense of humour.
Despite wanting to throw my arms around him and smother every inch of him with kisses, I am happy to swoon from afar.
By you, my gal, go for it!!!
Fiddler on the Roof
Better if "he was a rich man", Fiddler?
BLUE RAISAN - ASK FOR A DATE (HA HA)