The Mega-Zine Museum
October 23, 1996
TATH thanks God that Des Lynam is back - Gary Lineker has the charisma of an oat. Tath, stop doing your very poor Vinnie Jones impression. 0/10
PHILTHY PHIL is in the lead - 53 words on Mega-zine so far. My, what an interesting life you lead!
INTERNET CURTAINS returns to shed light on Average Believer's plight. The TV show hosted by Wilson and Sidebottom was called Remote Control. Ah, I remember it well...
Floyd the Barber says grunge isn't dead
IT'S JUST TAKING A REST, A LONG ONE!
DEAR REAL FAN
Here's another verse for 'Zine's poem:
There are no boring names like Rob,
We have Iron Lion and the Yellow Blob.
Then there is WLW with witty replies,
To amuse unsuspecting gals and guys.
So don't sit back and act very shy,
C'mon and give the 'Zine a try.
One more piece of info is vital,
Arsenal will win the Premiership title.
Ladybird, gunning for the Gunners
You've lost the plot somewhere,
ROB ISN'T A BORING NAME!
DEAR 'ZINE
I've heard you, 'Zinesters, weeping in your thousands because of my absence.
Well, stop wailing. I've answered your prayers. Yes, Trousers is back and he most definitely has got his coat on.
It's new trousers, new views, new policies, big smile. And I say: "Kula Shaker, they're good, only if you're sad and like listening to pretentious rich kids."
Bez's Working Trousers
A pity you didn't also get rid of
YOUR OLD MUSICAL BIG HEAD!
DEAR LITTLE MISS PADDLING
Control your longing for Jacques Villeneuve! I'm a mega Formula One fan, but I happen to be a girl. Thus I have a lot of trouble convincing boys I'm really serious about racing, not just in love with the drivers.
Then you come along and undo all my good work.
I'm not saying you can't be in love with Villenevue, but I wish it was because of his good driving which you neglected to mention.
Crazy Lemon
Vroom, vroom. Love in the pits
WLW TAKES YOU SERIOUSLY!
DEAR 'ZINE
There was a time when I worshipped Chris Evans - he was absolutely fab'.
Although he is still a funny man, he has changed from the funny un-cool presenter we all loved to the coolest entertainer around.
Now he's just a funny rich man, a show off. Fame and money has gone to his head.
There's nothing worse than a man who thinks he is "it", is there girls?
Heavenly Nobody, wishfully thinking
DEAR JCSMRSNBMWCD
I have a solution for your terrible problem - simply give the Prodigy stuff to a tramp.
The tramp will be able to sell them at a jumble sale for 25p. With this money he will be able to buy a bag of crisps.
So by using this idea, you will be recycling rubbish and feeding some poor tramp. Brilliant, eh?
Mad Max, making a bright debut
Enjoy your appearance, cheeky
IT'LL PROBABLY BE YOUR LAST!
