The Mega-Zine Museum
February 26, 1996
ITALIAN PASTA loves capers and anchovies on his pizzas and LOVES Nicoise olives from... Nice!
SPACE CADET thinks goat's milk yoghurt is yum. It has a cheesy tang and makes your jaw hurt if you laugh.
MICHAEL HESELTINE MP thinks Elizabeth David's books ROCK, esp Provincial French Cooking.
COLONIC IRRIGATOR thinks his is a vital role, to keep communication channels open.
WLW is fascinated by the culinary feel
OF TODAY'S SHORTCUTS. IT'S NUTS!
THE KIWI FRUIT
I sit in the fruit bowl feeling low,
as I watch the pretty fruit come and go.
People always pick the beautiful ones;
but I'm ugly, a kiwi that nobody loves.
Then one day a different boy comes along
and chooses me, knowing the others were wrong.
For he knew that inside I was good, sweet and kind.
Beauty's only skin-deep as I'm sure you will find.
Kiwi Girl
A SONG
If I was a rich man
Da da da da da dum
I'd have lots of money
Da da da da da dum
And I'd spend it
Da da da da da dum
On expensive things
Da da da da da dum
So go away peasants
Da da da da da dum
Iron Antelope Lion
All day long I'd dilly dilly dong
IF I WAS A WEALTHY MON
DEAR 'ZINE
We have some hints to prevent piles:
- Never sit down - ever
- Warm your pants thoroughly on a radiator before putting them on
- Go to the library and research the topic, to know all the cures
- Eat plenty of scallops and winkles
Pamphlett and the Record Contract
Piles of what? Dirty linen? Leaves?
FAN MAIL? WHAT? WHAT? TELL MEEEEE!
NORFOLK POEM
Doun in Narfolk
Land of farmers
Oo arr I say.
Cam ta Narfolk
Norwich Utd ahoy
King's Lynn FC
Oo arr I say
Ouze a fouze
doun in Narfolk
I'm confoused
Help me
Lucan Charlesyboy King
What are you incineratin'?
NARFALK IS SPECTACLEAR, BOY
DEAR MEGA-ZINE
What does it take to get on the splendid, cool, fabbo, highly addictive 'Zine?
Obsolete Orange, plucked from obscurity
