Mega-Zine
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February 28, 1996

HEIFER would definitely put a book on his head! He's also completely lost it!

RUBBERCHICKEN wrote to say he was feeling negative. He said... NO!

ANT MAN BEE quite rightly asks why the IRA have resumed bombing the mainland?

DEL G'S FUZZY TACHE kindly points out that the 'Zine made the back page of Melody Maker. We're famous!?

KING PHOENIX THE CRITIC wants to know why people are sad that TT have split.

It's obvious, King - To like TT in the

FIRST PLACE YOU'D HAVE TO BE SAD!

 

DEAR MEGA-ZINE

Who can blame Jarvis Cocker for what he did at the Brit Awards? I admire him for having the guts to make a protest.

The organisers ruined the event by falling back on the hyped-up American has-been at a time when we should be celebrating flourishing British music.

Michael Jackson's show was schmaltzy and completely over the top, he had no business being at the awards.

Strawberry Shortcake

 

THE MAN FROM DEL MONTE IS

  • Merely a company yes-man.
  • A regular on "Randall and Hopkirk... Deceased". Notice the constantly spotless white suit.
  • A loafer with nothing better to do than watch fruit-pickers. When have we ever seen him even volunteer to help?!

David O'Conner

The man from Del Monte is... RICH!

AND NOT BOTHERED WHAT YOU THINK!

 

DEAR 'ZINE

Being happy is ultimately important, right? Here's my suggestion as to how other 'Zinesters can get happy.

  • Make a list of 20 things you've never done, like listening to Zappa.
  • Over a month or so try to do all 20 things.

The achievement alone will make you happy!

Valley Girl, I am so sure!

 

INDICATIONS THAT LIFE MAY BE LOSING ITS ZEST

  • Your heart skips a beat everytime you glance at your stamp collection.
  • You find yourself counting the days left until your next visit from the door-to-door toilet brush salesperson.
  • You are the door-to-door toilet brush salesperson.
  • Your friends prefer to chat to your goldfish.

Insanity Personified

I thought this was normality.

TELL ME YOU WERE JOKING I.P.!!!

 

TO IRON LION ANTELOPE

So we don't have anything sensible to say, Mr Antelope?

Well, let's be honest your track record for sensible letters isn't that good!

The Joyrider