The Mega-Zine Museum
June 16, 1995
THE QUEEN VIC'S HEAD thinks she's working with Grant Mitchell, so in love is she. Pull the other one.
THE DAFFODILS WHO LOOK LOVELY TODAY has a saying for us - Life is sour, then you suck the lemon dry. Ouch.
DINO BAGGIO makes Superunknown smile.
NODDY looks about five but drives a car - go figure says Elyzium Succubus.
MANIC DEPRESSANT also has a quip - If life is an ocean, I can't swim.
Bob the Skutter says he is a shy type
AND GETS IGNORED. NOT BY WLW!
THE RETURN OF HOWARDS WAY
I stumbled upon this 8th Wonder of the World as I was just about to turn off the Neighbours credits.
It's just as I remember it. Moody, melodic theme tune (with arty 'boaty' shots) enticing me back to the exciting boat-building world.
Gripping storylines, classic fashion, mindless middle class characters and pathetic baldy sex-slime, Ken.
Queen of the Sublime and Paradine World
Government warning: Howards Way should
NOT BE TAKEN DAILY
TO MEGA-ZINE
Welcome to the asylum for those suffering from terminally bad lyrics. Step up Bryan Adams and Joey Lawrence.
"Sick and tired of this 'n' that and ya asking for favours
And using up my brand new razors."
Does that rhyme?
"We were meant girl me and you
But lately you have been aching like I smell like a zoo."
Purlease!
Gotta go, Mr Blobby wants me to hear his opus.
Little purple alien from Tismos.
ALBUM REVIEW - THE WILDHEARTS
To begin with, it comes encased in a soft velvet-like box. Nice to stroke if your labrador's ears are not at hand.
As for the music, it begins with the excellent "I wanna go" and ends with the excellent "Getting it". In between are another 11 songs of the same ilk.
Rock fans will love it - it's a very catchy sing-a-long album. Second best album of the year so far.
Psychotic Penguin, on a chain gang.
So it was "excellent" then - are you
CALLED BILL OR TED BY ANY CHANCE?
5 THINGS THAT FREAK YOUR PARENTS
- Sentences starting with the words "Now, don't freak but..."
- You making them a cuppa for no reason at all
- A nice dress in your wardrobe
- Baby clothes in your wardrobe
- Your new girl/boyfriend
Miss Maverick, in distraction.
HOW TO EAT JELLY BABIES
I'm with Emo Phillips on this one: - I like to bite the eyes out first and scream "Stop looking at me!"
Or... Melt them in a saucepan and pour the mixture into a rabbit-shaped jelly mould. It gives them a real identity crisis!
Dream of the Endless, Heart of the Dreaming.
I would hate to see what you do to
GINGERBREAD MEN
