The Mega-Zine Museum
May 21, 1995
ATLANTIC 252 plays brill stuff according to Moi (not me).
TATH AND BOB ask what makes David Duchovny attractive? If it's the suits, they're off to the shops right now!
MUTE WITNESS recommends Pulp's new single Common People, which is about a girl trying to fit in - not easy.
RUMBELOW'S REPAIR MAN suggests printing more cash to remedy the world's money problems. Explains why they went out of business?
Hole on Later With Jools Holland -
GREAT, SAYS POLLY HAIRSPRAY QUEEN
5 REASONS WHY MY GCSEs COULD GO TERRIBLY WRONG
- Chemistry
- I keep thinking they're a month away instead of a week
- Physics
- I revised in the hols but now I'm doing nothing
- I was more nervous a year ago
Introvert, needing a miracle.
Back to work Introvert! - Good luck
YOUTH
I made my mind to dance and play.
People don't respect the things we say.
From the skin of your T-shirt,
To the crown of thorns.
A little boy with crazy dreams,
A lot of goals.
Booga (the inbetweener)
PS Sorry, I ran out of paper.
Send the rest for blighty's sake
FINISH WHAT YOU STARTED OR ELSE...
HOW TO RELEASE A BRYAN ADAMS SINGLE
- Swallow about two buckets of sand
- Drink six pints of lager
- Stagger onto TOTP
- Think depressing thoughts and away you go...
- Bore people by staying at No1 for eons and eons.
- For Rod Stewart do the above and get a haircut from your mum
Fuzzy Kitten, Blur knows Best.
For Sting - the above, plus
A NOSE JOB AND NEVER SMILE
REPLY TO KATE COBAIN
Well, Kate, you wanted a new subject - so here it is... Bellybutton rings!
Why? I mean, what use are they? They don't even look nice, ooh, and the pain and what for?
All you get is a few naughty words when you accidentally get it caught in your jeans.
Oooooh noooo, not for me.
Sarah the Redhead, Red.
You could hang your keys on one...
HOW TO MAKE YOUSELF BETTER
- Eat lollies
- Listen to industrial music
- Wear your hair in bunches
- Don't be a homophobe
- Smash all neo-Naziz
- Feed the ducks
- Watch lots of motor sports
- Support anarchy
- Wear all black clothing
- Get involved in lots of moshes
The Psycho Nincher
What, pray, is a 'nincher'?
YOU'RE VERY, VERY STRANGE - HURRAH
