The Mega-Zine Museum
December 1, 1994
TOP NINE REASONS FOR GOING TO SCHOOL
- Seeing all your mates
- Sexy "intellectual" (in their 20s) male teachers
- Matchmaking your pals
- Admiring sixth form prefects
- Something to gossip about
- Nicking posters from the common room
- Discovering Mega-zine
- School dinners (eh-no)
- Learning of course (not!)
The Slender Babe, Glasgow
Liked number seven
TOP TEN WHYS
- Why isn't Scotland Yard in Scotland?
- Why are "friends" so two-faced?
- Why was the Spin Doctors' Glasgow concert an 18+ only?
- Why are Gun so good?
- Why does Paul Goddard have no taste?
- Why is there war?
- Why are all MPs so boring?
- Why did Take That decide to have a new image?
- Why is Damian in Home & Away?
- Why won't this get printed?
The Slender Babe & The Slick Chick
You again!
YOU LEAVE PAUL G ALONE
DEAR 'ZINE
Can I just point out how true to life the Spitting Image version of Nigel Mansell is?
I can? Oh good, thank you very much. Don't you find he's a bit of a pilchard?
Splodge The Gorp
Gorpdale, Near Astro Farm
Thank you for that
DEAR 'ZINE
I was jolly glad to hear about the spiffing new Criminal Justice Bill. Isn't it wonderful that those scruffy hooligans can now be arrested for disrupting our Sunday fox hunts?
Foxes are pests - nay, vermin - and we must restrict their numbers (for their own good, of course).
Besides, our dogs have so much fun ripping the blighters to pieces.
Edward, A Man With Moral Values
Lovely to hear from you Edward, Sir
TO ALL 'ZINERS
Remember that thing I wrote about drugs and Maria McKee? Well, I can't believe I wrote that! I feel so stupid about it now.
I didn't mean all I said. I hate the fact drugs mess you up, but if people wanna sing about it, that's fine. I guess I just misunderstood the song.
I hope I cleared that up!
Fresh Prince of Luton
We'll forgive you this time
