The Mega-Zine Museum
March 13, 1994
DEAR TAKE THAT FANS
You clearly need help. Ever thought of a Cure or Therapy? I suggest you take Extreme measures - book into a Soul Asylum and let out an almighty Primal Scream!
If this doesn't work, try Smashing Pumpkins, although this often causes your eyes to Blur. If all else fails, lie on the Pavement, smear yourself with Pearl Jam and try to find Nirvana.
The Magic Weasel, Cherub Rock
Very clever.
DEAR 'ZINE,
I have to write and tell you that in no way do I agree with the letter from Not a TT Fan who stated they have as much talent as a dead slug.
Come on now, let's be fair - to slugs that is! Obviously TT are awful, but I love slugs - they have a million times more talent than TT will ever have!
Not A TT Fan, But A Lover of Slugs
Stop the TT bashing NOW!
CAN WE ALL PICK ON WHITNEY INSTEAD?
POEM ABOUT WHEELY BINS
Wheely bins - what a great invention
For hiding in when you've got detention
If you are tall you can not hide
If you are small you fall inside
They are used for throwing away litter
Especially old cans of Boddington's Bitter
When they are full and up to the brim
Along to empty them comes dustman Jim
If not for wheely bins what would we do
Our rubbish'd go in the downstairs loo!
Mr McAteer's Register Machine
Truly mind-edifying!
TOP TEN THINGS TO MAKE YOU SMILEY
- Warm, sunny days
- Walking barefoot through fields of grass
- Keanu Reeves
- Sweet-smelling flowers
- Sunday morning lie-ins
- Daydreaming
- Dressing how you like
- Being childish
- Bear hugs
- Smiling at strangers in the street
Lovechild, Hippyland
HIPPIE-HIPPIE SHAKE!
TEN UNDENIABLE TRUTHS
- Billy Corgan is a singwriting genius
- John Peel is culturally important
- The Tories are useless
- So is Labour
- Techno/Rave is NOT real music
- Indie/crusty/goth/punk IS
- Punk isn't just a fashion trend
- RuPaul really looks like a woman!
- People are all indeed VERY strange
- Mega-Zine is brill! (Crawl, crawl)
A Crazy Person Called Moe
Sound perfectly sane to me!
THEATRE REVIEW: RETURN TO THE FORBIDDEN PLANET
It is a very loud musical taking you through the best of 50s and 60s music. It has won several awards and is the best thing I have ever seen.
It's very witty with songs like Wipe Out, Great Balls of Fire and the Monster Mash. I'm going to see it again.
We were all clapping and demanding at the end, GO NOW - it's excellent!
Tom Stevens, Cornwall
Demanding WHAT, pray tell!
