The Mega-Zine Museum
January 26, 2006
TEXT MANIACS
DAGGSY One of my gerbils is too fat. Want him? Fatist!
THE BARKING TREE Does that mean Dave Da Rave, that there are 50 ways to leave a Dalek? 50 ways to leave a Dalek? Is number one storming out the door?
MORE MANIACAL TERRIBLENESS
DALEK Ah, bless you Dave Da Rave. Don't listen to Paul Simon. He's not the same since Garfunkel left him - the moody wotsit. You're getting personal.
PET ZOMBIE There' a song called January by Goldfinger (WHO RULE!) so, The One With The Mighty Antlers, January does ROCK! As does February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September...
DOUGIE THE MINESWEEPER Shish kebabs rock! Veggie kebabs rock too, man.
GREEN DAY
I'll volunteer my combusting services to set fire to Green Day, that way they may stop their awful attempt at music.
Or, maybe I could just peck them a few times, yes, that would be fun.
The Spontaneously Combusting Penguin
You sound like an old mother hen.
JANUARY'S LITTLE JOKE
To The One With The Mighty Antlers:
They may not have released it, but 22nd Best Band In Scotland Of All Time, Trashcan Sinatras, had a song called January's Little Joke.
A lovely little tune it is too.
Crinkle-Cut Beatroot
Would you like to sing us a line, Crinkle-Cut Beatroot?
POEM FOR WLW
WLW, you are so fine,
I will write you another poem on Valentine,
I'm sorry it's late,
I ran out of paper so here is your poem,
Another year later!
The Sheep That Lost Its Wool
Aww, shucks, a poem for moi? Fabulous. I shall look forward to our next encounter on February 14.
PUNISHMENT
Lord WLW,
As punishment for picking on The One With The Mighty Antlers, you must be cuffed to The Cheeky Girls for two weeks.
Sir Moanalot the 3rd
Cuffed to Gabi and Monica? I can think of worse punishments - eating my own vomit is one of them.
BLOKES WITH BEARDS
Here's my top 5 blokes with beards (past and current beards):
- Bill Bailey
- Rolf Harris
- Dave Grohl
- Hugh Laurie
- Jack Black
Penfold
What?! No Noel Edmonds (my personal favourite beardy man) or Jeremy Beadle?
