The Mega-Zine Museum
September 28, 2005
ONE-WINGED ANGEL I want to play the spoons in the 'Zine band. You'll only bend them...
BANANA SPLIT Our school is meant to be a technology college and none of the printers are working. How stupid is that? You should see 'Zine Towers.
TANTRIC TEXTS
GORDON BENNETT'S BESTEST BUD Can anyone tell me why the page numbers for TV channels aren't the same for Teletext and Ceefax? It just confuses me and I always end up on the wrong page on the wrong channel... Ask my assistant.
THE SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUSTING PENGUIN Wooo, Fernando Alonso rules! Who?
WHAT'S IN A NAME My pet hate: people who walk up the up escalator? Why people, why?! Coz they're so slow.
I once got stuck going up on a down
ESCALATOR. GIRAFFEY HELL
GUTLESS WONDER
I've been writing to 'Zine since 1993. I always hoped someone would write and ask about my identity. It's been a LONG wait.
Smashed, Squashed and Juicy are all me. Hector's House was a kids' programme about a dog called Hector. There was also a cat called Zaza and a frog called Kiki. Denise Bryer did the voices for Kiki and Noddy.
I saw a horse today... then I saw two Stobarts. I also found 6p.
Smashed Strawberry, Hector's House
The mystery has been unravelled. Now
WHAT WILL THE 'ZINERS TALK ABOUT?
THE 'ZINE BAND
You know, it sounded interesting. I could write stuff and I can play backing with the electric guitar better than some of those idiots in the charts, but I've not got the hang of fancy solos yet.
However, when I found out I could be the next Nirvana, I decided I'd rather use said guitar to hammer nails into my head... But then I'd look like a member of Slipknot. That's even worse.
Daggsy
Are you in or out? You can play the
KNIVES AND (BLUNT) FORKS IF YOU LIKE
HOPELESSLY ADDICTED
Thanks to the signpost dude who advertises the local tattooist's when he's on the march. I am now hooked on Megadeth.
He recommended them and my favourite song at the moment is Trust, which has a really good drum solo building up with cellos and then a humongous lead riff that stays in your head for ages.
The song is pretty well written too. Get Cryptic Writings while it's still cheap, people!
Luco El Loco
Oh dear, I can't think of anything
WORSE. GIVE ME SCISSOR SISTERS QUICK
FIRST 'ZINE WEDDING?
WLW, you said the other day about odds-on faves for first 'Zine wedding. Hate to break this to you, you probably having bought yourself a spiffing new hat, but there have been hundreds of 'Zine Weddings. At least 34, anyway.
Even if you meant Junior Minister's 'Zine wedding, you'd be advocating 'Zine bigamy. Which is a direct breach of 'Zine law 326, and it's not very fitting for a young politician to be going to prison, is it?
Lilac Leopard
WHAAAAAT??? Why haven't I been
INVITED? I SHOULD BE MAID OF HONOUR
