The Mega-Zine Museum
August 31, 2005
DJ DAVE Cricket. There aren't any Aussies in here, are there? No, they're OUT! Ha ha!
SO MANY FISH Today's 'Zine was brought to you by the letters W, L and W, and the number 7. Ooh, my lucky number!
SECOND PAGE OFFERINGS
PLASTIC FROG After extensive research conducted on my holiday, I have concluded that surfing is a very wet sport. Why, were you feeling board?
NUMBERTHREE I am officially the loudest 'Ziner. You should be proud of me. Can you keep it down? I'm trying to sleep!
SNOOTCHIE BOOTCHIES Say, would you like a chocolate-covered pretzel? Pretzels taste like funny-shaped cardboard.
What is the most embarrassing
MOMENT 'ZINERS HAVE EVER HAD?
THE HUGGING GAME
Ever played this? It's where you and a group of friends go out into the public and try to hug as many people as you possibly can (with their consent of course, otherwise they'd arrest you), and the person with the most hugs wins.
I was on the receiving end of this last week in our invasion of Manchester city centre. They skipped and everything.
I made five friends that day (and walked into a policeman).
Arrant Nerd Boxes Yodeller
Have you ever thought of
MOVING TO CALIFORNIA?
EBAYING
Can I please alert all 'Ziners to the wonders of eBay? It is truly, truly wonderful. One of God's finest moments, I'd say.
After buying two lockets, a school bag and a pair of straighteners on it, I'm already addicted.
Hair straighteners, really expensive but so worth it? £15. Brand new. I got there first.
Hahahahaha! You now have frizzy hair forever.
Six Lumps of Sugar
Northerners buy spearmint there
IT'S EBAY GUM
FLATTERY
Somebody posed as me a while back writing about tanning beds... I'm not sure why somebody would want to be me, but I shall take that as a compliment.
I will also take it as a compliment that a friend's girlfriend feels threatened by me and makes mean comments. What has she got to worry about? She's the one that's a stripper - I'm just a quiet unassuming country girl with a music taste no-one understands!
Luco El Loco
I'm really not getting involved
WITH THIS ONE AT ALL
GRUMPY OLD MEN
While watching the TV show Grumpy Old Men, it dawned on me that I agreed with almost everything they were moaning about. Does that mean I'm grumpy, old, and, more worryingly - a man?
Also, there was a guy dressed up in a cat outfit crawling about in the dark up my road last week, who pounced on my dad's car as he drove past. Might have been the full moon that drove him to such a state.
Tartan Scarf
Just be philosophical about it
TABBY... OR NOT TABBY?
TEXTING
This new texting malarkey - they say e-mail and texting is killing off the English language.
That's fine by me, we can all speak Cockney rhyming slang instead.
Would you Adam and Eve it, I'll give you a pony for that titfer.
Norman Radcliffe
Turn it in, my son
YOU'RE HAVIN' A BUBBLE!
