The Mega-Zine Museum
April 28, 2005
ANIME BUDDY Vera Duckworth has a Cliff Richard doll. Is that her possession, or her voodoo doll? Her baby.
DADDYPOOS I bought a new frock - white with bird droppings. Salesman said: "Suits you, sir. Suits you." I'll get him at playtime... Drop it like a dropping, then.
LAURA AND HER MASSEZ Why procrastinate now when you can procrastinate later? Because I can't be bothered. I'd rather think about it in a bit.
N-A-M-E-S
Archibald - it is a wondrous name, no? I mean, imagine all the, you know, cool stuff you, you know, could do if, you know, it was, you know, your name.
You'd be able to say: "Hey, dude! My name's Archibald but you can call me Archie!" Archie's short for Archibald.
'Tis funny how boys have names like Adam and Simon, girls have names like Alice and Sarah, yet boys and girls have names like Alex and Sam. Madness!
Evaporated Milk
You've been overdosing on that
BABY NAMES BOOK AGAIN, HAVEN'T YOU?
OH NO, NOT AGAIN...
I was watching TV last night, after reading 'Zine, when I realised to my horror that the people responsible for Crazy Frog are back with a vengeance: Nessie The Dragon.
A third addition to the most annoying mobile phone media collection ever.
They just don't know when to give up do they?
Space Matador
Rrrrrrrring a ding and Rrrrrring
OH LORD, WHAT CAME OVER ME?
BEING ILL
There are benefits of being ill, despite the fact I'm gaining bed sores at the expense of being re-elected. I found an unread paper from three months ago under the bed and a battery.
I am managing to get plenty of sleep with the help of John Virgo. He's like a bedtime story teller as he talks me to sleep with his snooker tales. He makes me so hungry does big John. I bet he has some food in that beard of his.
Junior Minister
Ugh, reminds me of the time I
FOUND THAT BIT OF CHICKEN IN IT
GREAT GOOGLE NAME SEARCH
- Lilac Leopard: 363 results
- Interesting Chair: 690 results
- Topper: 2,290,000 results
- Farmer Jack: 34,200 results
- Comic Critic: 3,480 results
- Iceblink Luck: 952 results
- Dr Namgge: 3 results
Three. That's an outrage.
The sad part is one of those was Vegetable Revolution, one was a Sonic forum and the third was a German website.
Dr Namgge
Yowsers. Get on the phone to Noris
MCSQUIRTER. THAT'S A RECORD.
FUNDU-CATIONAL
How come polar bears do not eat penguins? They cannot open the wrappers!
But it is really impossible because polar bears live in the Arctic and penguins live in the Antarctic.
Gosh! - it is fun and educational mixed together (funducational).
Little Blue Fox
Stop the Penguin biscuit revolution
JAFFAS ALL THE WAY
MINTY FRESH STUFF
The minty fresh goodness in a bottle. Mouthwash. Yum. You're not supposed to drink it. But it tastes so good.
So many different flavours: cool mint, fresh mint, the green one, the blue one... oh, and Dentyl pH of course. Quite why they name it pH when acid destroys our teeth is beyond me.
That one looks pretty, but it isn't a patch on the cheaper stuff for flavour. Mint cordial, on the other hand, is foul.
Elden Ray
And why was it you had to have your
STOMACH PUMPED AGAIN?
