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March 8, 2004

DA FIT BLONDE TOWNIE WIT DA SCORE The Darkness are the worst thing since moshers. I have nothing to say to that apart from you are dead right.

HP BAAXTER Peter Andre. Why? Because we need something to make the charts fun.

ANTI-SOCIAL SOCIALIST So Atomic Kitten have split up — what is the world coming to? Wait a minute, that's irony. They're still going for another few days at least. Then we've got the solo careers. God help us.

 

CONVERSATIONS WITH THE ELDERLY

STUTTERCUT:"Hey there Edna."
EDNA:"Bo out me homy."
STUTTERCUT:"Excuse me?"
EDNA:"Peace to the East side brother."
STUTTERCUT:"Wait a second, you're not Edna, you're Mos Def."
MOS DEF:"Most Definitely."

Stuttercut

I hope someone understood that

'COS I SURE DIDN'T!

 

WHAT DO TEACHERS ACTUALLY DO ON STAFF TRAINING DAYS?

  • Trash the school?
  • Plan their sick days?
  • Change the grades just for fun?
  • Make fun of the students (a la The Simpsons)?
  • Have a wild party, dancing to thumping dance music and consuming an unhealthy amount of alcohol?

The Wonky Gnome

I never had you down as the

TRAINEE TEACHER TYPE

 

SUMMER

So, now that winter is going out of fashion, I wonder what we all have to look forward to over the summer?

It is not all fun and games — we live in constant threat of bees and sunburn, and inflation means that combined bee and sunburn repellent is more expensive than it was this time last year.

Bearing this in mind, I think we should all flee the country and live on a penguin sanctuary.

The Suited Stranger

Where they make Penguin biscuits?

I'M SO THERE!

 

A RECENT SURVEY

I have been carrying out a survey on your "establishment". Said survey suggests that:

  • 3 in 10 of your users like Busted and/or Blazin' Squad.
  • 98% of your users hate townies.
  • 1% of your users are friends with townies.
  • 1% of your users are townies.

I know where to find you Blazin' Squad loving, tracksuit-wearing fiends.

Contract Killer V1.0

Survey results are dreadfully dull

ANSWERING THE QUESTIONS IS MORE FUN

 

NEOPETS ANONYMOUS

I'm big enough to admit that I have a problem. My name is Blonde Butterfly, and I'm addicted to Neopets.

I spend far too much time playing Whack-A-Kass and betting on Poogle races.

Can someone help me, please? Or just destroy the Neopets website? Either is fine.

Blonde Butterfly

I suggest a walk

IN THE FRESH AIR

 

LONG TIME, NO WRITE

Hello my lovelies, I apologise for my long absence but I do have a good reason for this.

At Christmas I appeared in the Busted Christmas Special as "Screaming Girl number 2", and due to my new-found fame I have been rushed off my feet.

I am also currently starring in the Busted Who's David video as "random hand waving about".

So you gotta look out for that!

Odd Cod

Inventive excuses

BUT I'M NOT SURE I BELIEVE YOU

 

THE ULTIMATE 'ZINER LIST

Insane Jam Sow's website is indeed very cool, Vladmir's Hat. And that list of every 'Ziner ever printed makes for interesting scrolling.

For example, we may not remember A Ready Salted Crisp Called Bozza, or Fido The Confused Elephant, but thanks to Jammy's list, their comic genius lives on.

The DeLorean That Got Struck By Lightning

Like a school yearbook

WITHOUT THE DODGY PICS