The Mega-Zine Museum
October 25, 2003
THE ASPARAGUS MAN I was wondering just what the difference betwixt being embarrassed and being humiliated is? An extra red face?
THE POSSESSED SPOON Never try and make cheese on toast in a toaster. It doesn't work. Or beans on toast. Davord made a right mess. Mabel wasn't happy.
BIG BOB FLAPPER How can someone fall down a well? Was it just a myth to keep Skippy employed? I'd rather not look close enough to find out.
SIXTH FORM
Ahh yes, I am finally in sixth form.
Unfortunately, after five years of being in a girls' school I'm unable to communicate with boys in our mixed sixth form. This leads to blank looks and slight dribble when they talk to me.
Oh help me, WLW.
Gerty and her Onions
Ask them questions about themselves
THEY LOVE THAT
SURROUNDED AND OUTNUMBERED
The battle seemed lost. Suddenly, Cecil appeared. Armed only with his waspish wit, he confronted the enemy.
"You're so overbearing, like aniseed", he lisped. The enemy was devastated by this verbal assault. They dropped their weapons and fled.
Cecil was awarded the Golden Pot Noodle for valour and became an inspiration to sensitive young men everywhere.
Justanothersillyname
Inspiring to lispers as well
BIT LIKE CHRITH EUBANK
MINIS!
Aren't Minis just the coolest car ever made! They're like little fat happy people surrounded by miserable supermodels.
And they've got those cool Mini Adventure ads. My favourite is the one in the cinemas where the mini jumps over the next ad.
In summary, anyone who can say anything bad against Minis deserves a slap. Thank you for listening.
The Mogtrix
Mummy WLW wanted to buy one
NEW ONE'S TOO EXPENSIVE
MMM, CRAB MEAT
To whoever asked, it's obvious that Sebastien is a crab. He always has been, and always will be.
Why else was he going to be put in a crab pie? Give some respect to the little seabound crustacean.
Pint Sized Pineapple
He was gonna be crab pie?
I'M GOING VEGGIE
RUBBISH
My room has reached a certain extreme level of untidyness. This of course just shows that I'm an absent minded genius. One day this will be realised.
But to my point. Today after unwrapping a lollipop (cherry flavour), without thinking I placed the wrapper down carefullly on my floor.
It might be untidy but at least I don't abuse my rubbish. Or something.
Caged Liberty
Well, if it
KEEPS THE RATS HAPPY...
POETRY CORNER
Every day at half past three,
I veg in front of my TV.
Teletext, page 382,
I really don't have much to do...
You see me ducks, it is the time
To read my darling Mega-Zine.
Paper Trails
You've seen ducks here?
I THOUGHT THE LAKE WAS EMPTY
TWO STUPID DOGS
I remember waking up each morning before I went to school, eating my bowl of Chex cereal, and watching this amazing show.
I think they only made about 10 episodes, but they were all classics.
The small upbeat dog, and the big slow dog with eyes under his hair — brilliant.
Fat Mike
Were they related
TO LASSIE?
