The Mega-Zine Museum
October 19, 2003
THE HOOPIEST FROOD How can I control my life if I can't control my hair? Buy strong life straighteners.
SAMURAI HEDGHEHOG Who do you prefer, the Manics or Scooter? I know who I'd choose, and here's a clue: it's not Scooter. My sister's listening to Scooter now, you see. I blame myself. I'd rather cut off my ears.
BIG BOB FLAPPER I wonder what Ringo Starr is doing these days? Really? I wonder about Grotbags.
NEW PUB NAMES
- The Rat and Stupid Dog.
- The Strange Smell In The Loft At Home.
- The Infinite Castle In The Sky.
- The Middle-Aged Specific Tree.
- The Busy Fizzy Pit.
- Hell With A Smirk.
Topper
I think the last one is already
ROUND THE CORNER FROM THE TOWERS
DERREN BROWN
Possibly even madder than Blaine. Imagine trying to live while shooting yourself. Mad. But not as mad as my idea: mixing the two "tricks".
Someone lives in a glass box for 44 days with no food, while playing Russian Roulette every day.
Any volunteers?
Gnuffo1
Richard Blackwood
MUST BE AVAILABLE
SNOOKER
Does anyone else think this is a great game? Some of the players are very cute — Paul Hunter, for example, and there are just SO many jokes about balls it's unbelievable!
Actually I think I'll go watch some right now. Enjoy your meaningless lives everyone.
Me and My Insanity
Prefer pool myself
TOO MANY BALLS GET CONFUSING
I KNOW WHO YOU ARE
That's right, WLW is Richey Edwards. It explains why you hate the Manics because you dislike how they sound without you.
Now, if someone could tell me when 'Zine started, we could see if it matched up with the year Richey vanished.
Yes, yes, I know I'm as good as Sherlock Holmes.
Mr Self Destruct
Sorry, wrong
MY EYELINER IS MUCH NEATER
INTERNATIONAL SUPERGITS
I have come up with a new club for all the gloomy 'Ziners. Its name is International Supergits, and its mission is to spread cynicism and sarcasm across all countries, so making the world a less deluded place.
Anyone may join, but it helps if you're an old git or a pseudo old git like me.
I would invite the Brigadier, but he's too port-addled to understand, I imagine.
Anathema
Can I head up the leadership?
I'LL TRY TO EXPLAIN IT TO BRIGGIE
A SOCK CRISIS
I seem to have a very serious problem. I can't seem to find matching socks to go with my purple trousers.
I am going on a date tonight with this gorgously gorgous lad — oh hecky! Do you think he will mind if I wear Chicken Run ones?
Shall I ask Dr Nick?
The Long Blonde Brunette
Comedy socks
HE'LL THINK YOU'RE HAVING A LAUGH
JESUS' MUM AND DAD
Are we really supposed to believe they never "consummated" their marriage? I mean, imagine a brother of Jesus...
"My brother will beat you up."
"So? My brother'll get his dad to smite your dad, and destroy his land and send him to hell where he shall burn forever."
And what about sibling rivalry?
"Mum, look, I can swim!"
"So what? Jesus could walk on water by the time he was your age."
Freshly Squeezed Cynic
I'm not even going to start
A RELIGIOUS DEBATE
