The Mega-Zine Museum
June 22, 2003
THE GEEK WHO SHALL INHERIT THE EARTH If only I was still going to school... I'd give Busted such a beating. Too late. They ran off with Miss MacKenzie.
TUFFNILL'S TUFF TUFT Is there any chance someone could lend Phil some conditioner? Lend? Who wants it back after it's been in the jungle?
MELTED SUFRAGETTE UNDERTAKER If I only had one pair of socks and all the other socks were odd, would the pair of socks not be the odd ones? Only if they came out, walking by themselves.
WLW,
I have come up with an idea that will revolutionise the business world and in the process make me millions. A 99p store!
Think about it, there are hundreds of £1 stores about but there are few, if any, 99p stores.
I will call it Less Than A Poundworld! We will sell stuff like port for the Brigadier, giraffe toys for you, as well as a variety of stuff that people might actually want.
Viva La Revolution
Sorry to disappoint you but
THEY'RE ALL OVER SCOTLAND
JOBS
Unfortunately, the impending realisation of having to find a full-time job is looming.
My ideas are as follows:
- Clown
- Boobah
- Tycoon
- Scarecrow
- Toy tester
- King
- Religious leader
Topper
I'd go for the king
NICE UNIFORM
TEAM ANTI-MALE
To determine the gender of WLW I shall start a team. If WLW joins this team, she is undoubtedly female. This team shall be called Team Anti-male.
They're even more confusing than us women folk — they never make up their minds, and this is incredibly odd, because as far as I can tell, they don't have minds to make up!
Chocolate Me
I could join and be a disgruntled
MALE GAY GIRAFFE
TOP FIVE GREAT TO SAY WORDS
- Glockenspiel
- Gnu
- Plinth
- Sphinx
- Phantasmagoria
I do prefer a higher ratio of consonants to vowels, don't you, WLW?
I Can Believe It's Not Butter
I'm no Carol Vorderman but I like to
ROLL MY RRRRS
EPIC QUOTES FROM MR PRESIDENT
- "I stand by all the mis-statements that I've made."
- "It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
- "(It's) time for the human race to enter the solar system."
The Elusive Shadow
Thank goodness you don't record what
I SAY. YOU DON'T, DO YOU???!
ONE DOWN...
So, One True Voice (still the worst name for a group ever) now only have four voices instead of five. And I'm aware that doesn't make much sense.
And neither does the guy who's left. He thinks he'll be able to launch a successful solo career! In stand-up, maybe.
A Leprechaun Called Steve
Daniel could join Fast Food Rockers
PRACTISE BEFORE WORKING AT KFC
'ZINER BIG BROTHER
So Channel 4 aren't going to show another series of Celebrity Big Brother because they can't do anything new with it. So why are they still running normal Big Brother then?
I suggest that we fill the house with 'Ziners and see what happens! I nominate Briggie.
Psychadelic Magickal Maiden
I bet Briggie is STILL watching Jon
AND ROOTING FOR HIM TO WIN
