The Mega-Zine Museum
June 8, 2003
A LEPRECHAUN CALLED STEVE If Jemini said the monitors were faulty, how come everyone else was fine? Methinks they are telling porkies. You thought Germany was fine? Let's get happy...
THE CONSTIPATED POMEGRANATE OF LOWER BLADSVILLE I shall now return to my cave, and drink my bovril. PS: I have no latrine... Stay in the cave, please. For all our safety's sakes.
COMMANDER BROWN WLW, I was going to make you a gender bender badge. I need a coat to pin it on first.
GREETINGS
Having just returned from the Planet Moz, I thought it was about time to introduce myself to you.
Being The Last Cheese Toastie ever, I have been endowed with powers transcending normal toasties and am Lord Morrissey's connection to the outside world.
Now he's back in the limelight, I will be acting as his cheese manager. Expect more from him soon.
The Last Cheese Toastie
Let's hope he stops hamming it up
'THO IT IS GOOD WITH CHEESE
IF 'ZINERS WERE OASIS SONGS
- Samurai Hedgehog: Supersonic (as in super Sonic the Hedgehog!).
- The Brigadier: Live Forever (at his age, he's got to!).
- Duchess Pandora of Ormondroyd: Columbia (mysterious and unusual, but very enjoyable!).
- The Wonky Gnome: Roll With It (he/she is a Blur fan after all...).
- WLW: Wonderwall (known by everyone on the planet, and both begin with W).
DJ Dave
I said maybe, you're gonna be the one
THAT MAKES ME TEA? DAVORD? DAVOOORD!
TO THE AQA EXAMINERS...
Hi, I am the one who wrote of Lord Of The Flies, "When considering the novel as a whale" in my English Literature GCSE exam.
Please notice that I am not referring to a mammal of the blue or Orca variety. I meant to write "whole", for those who are interested.
Concrete Donkey
I pity whoever marked that paper
AS THAT MADE NO SENSE TO ME
IF 'ZINERS WERE STAR TREK CHARACTERS
- WLW: Captain Kirk (oldest but greatest person ever).
- The Brigadier: Jean-Luc Picard (a respectable old man, once very powerful now unwanted and retired).
- Big Bob Flapper: Admiral Janeway (still at large but not as much publicity).
- Me: Tuvok (no emotions but very illogical).
The Psychotic Labrat
Oldest and greatest ever?
SHUCKS MUM, STOP WRITING IN!
'ZINE
Stop dissin' my future husband! OK, here goes. I'm getting married!
All of you (including you WLW) are invited, and guess who I'm marrying? Charlie from Busted!
Just think, all those long cold winter nights and I can snuggle up to those eyebrows. Heaven, eh?
Also, that helmet he wears, it works wonders for me.
Emma the lil' Angel
I hope you know he sleeps
WITH THE LIGHTS ON. WUSS
CROP CIRCLES
These are a highly misunderstood phenomena. While farmers see them as 'Signs', those despicable aliens hover above us, laughing in their circular spaceships making their stolen popcorn!
Ha! Draw me a spaceship, WLW?
Purple Raccooness
So long as they stay away from my
GARDEN AND MARCEL'S NUTS
FARSCAPE
Seeing as how no one has mentioned Farscape in the "battle of the sci-fi's", I feel I must stand up for all the Scapers, who, it seems, don't read page 182.
Farscape is clearly better than the X-Files and Star Trek and all the other shows out there.
And as there are so many Teams now, I will start a club: Club Farscape.
Those who want to join can and will receive no freebies.
Sykopathik Mushroom
Sci-fi is almost as rubbish as the
DATING LETTERS.
