The Mega-Zine Museum

March 7—8, 2003

GECKO-LAND GECKO I am a Gecko from Gecko Land. I eat loads of Jaffas and buckets of sand. Doesn't the sand stick in your... forked tongue?

THE GODDESS OF THE MICROWAVE Do U like txting WLW? Very much. 55 in one night for one lucky recipient.

THE GHOST OF TGWSITE Like Matchbox Twenty, I have a disease, unfortunately it isn't of the poetic variety. It must be the one of no-hits losers then. There's no cure for that. Oasis have been trying for years.

CAT

My poem on Cat Deeley:

Cat, Cat, Cat,
You're no dog,
Cat, Cat, Cat,
I'm a prince, inside a frog,
Cat, Cat, Cat
Your beauty astounds,
Cat, Cat, Cat
You turn my leaps into bounds.

Please Check With The Bill Payer Before Reading

Poems for Mavis please. Other pussies

GETTING ATTENTION ISN'T FAIR

WLW

As this is my first ever e-mail to 'Zine, I was hoping that you would be ever so kind and print it for me.

Do you think you could print a picture of a sock please?

The Sock That Ran Away

Looks just like the one I lost

DOWN THE LAUNDERETTE

HA HA HA

OK everyone, marvel at my comic genius! This is a joke I made up all by myself.

If a member of Blazin' Squad is drowning, what do you do?

Take your foot off his head!

Watch out Peter Kay!

Shirley The Rainbow Sheep

You're hired for our

CHRISTMAS PARTY ENTERTAINMENT

THIS COULD BE A CASE FOR MULDER AND SCULL-EE!

Catatonia were a great band and everything, but I always wondered something about them.

What was Cerys Matthews, an attractive twentysomething, doing hanging about with four men who look old enough to be her dad?

It's all very strange.

Mr Robofish

She just got married in

A TRACTOR. GO FIGURE

HOBNOBS AND JAFFA CAKES

Hobnobs and Jaffa Cakes are as nice as each other.

Here's why:

1. They both have chocolate.
2. Hobnobs have the wonderful oaty taste.
3. Jaffa Cakes have the orangey bit.

Dave the Evil Bunny

See, like Ziners, biscuits can all

DUNK NICELY TOGETHER

HANDS OFF MY BRIGGIE

Greetings fellow 'Ziners.

I would just like to state, that a 'Ziner — yes, a fellow 'Ziner — has been flirting with my Briggie!

I don't know why they want to do it, but I just have a message for her: Listen you Chocolate Dipped Trekkie, keep your sticky mits off my Brigadier!

Jambonica the Psychic

Two fancy women?!

MUST BE THE CRAVATS

FINGERS

• Thumb: full of life, happy and friendly.
• Index finger: wise, noble, doesn't mind getting his hands(?) dirty.
• Middle finger: prone to rude behaviour, loud and brash.
• Finger in-between middle finger and little finger: psychological problems, lacks an identity.
• Little finger: sweet and kind, a friend to all, if slightly camp.

Topper

Hands:

GOOD FOR SLAPPING

Back

Next