The Mega-Zine Museum
December 22, 2002
THE DIMGIRL (FROM THE MOLEHOLE) I'm quite pleased with myself... I now automatically go to p182 when I want 'Zine. It's the quickest I've ever learnt something! Well done you.
SAMURAI HEDGEHOG Merry Christmas, WLW. I got you some Dandelion and Burdock and a Blazin' Squad CD. See, someone loves you. Yes, but obviously not you.
GENIUS AT WORK AOL have put Holly Valance in the entertainment section. That Connie woman has no idea at all.
MY FIRST POEM
New girl, new girl
I love you so
Your eyes they glisten
And your hair does flow
I look across the common room
Admiring your good looks
Even though, in reality
You probably hate my guts
The Yorkie Bar Kid
My advice would be not to try and
WOO HER WITH YOUR POETRY
COMMISERATIONS
Never mind WLW, I know you like the Cheeky Girls but sadly, not the number one spot this time.
On behalf of WLW, in his/her time of pain and grieving, I think we should hold a minute's silence (pause for a minute and remove hat).
Chin up WLW, maybe they'll reach the No 1 spot next time. That's something to look forward to.
Jambon Magnetique
I admire your optimism that there will
ACTUALLY BE A NEXT TIME!
TEAM EVIL
I have noticed the sudden epidemic of Team Avril and I have decided that I am gonna take on each and every member of it, including my friend who has turned to the Avril side.
So, to Team Avril, and in the words of many before me: "Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough!"
The Fors@ken One.
This won't go down too well —
SHE HAS MANY DISCIPLES ON HERE
ARE YOU PENNILESS?
I was recently on the new Sauce pages just minding my own biz, when I saw a letter written by someone asking if WLW wrote for Sauce too.
So, tell us, is it true? Has the rent gone up drastically on WLW Towers that you've had to take a second job?
If so, here's 20p — but if it's all a big mistake, then I expect it back in 24 hours or else!
Insane Marshmallow
You can have your 20p back — wasn't me.
AND IT WASN'T ME ON B*AKCH*T EITHER!
THE NED
As all Scottish 'Ziners will know, "Townies" are nothing compared to the Scottish variant, the Ned. Imagine a normal townie, but with more fake gold jewellery than Mr T and the need to put the words "pure", "mad" and "mental" into every sentence.
And they throw sweets at people like me, and miss. And I live in Paisley, Ned capital of the world.
Paisley — abandon hope all ye who enter here.
Freshlysqueezedcynic
But you do have lovely patterned...
STUFF
SPROUTS
There they sit on the table at Christmas, the lonely and unliked vegetable. I always eat one, despite the fact they taste totally foul, because I feel sorry for them.
I mean, really, apart from a few old people, who actually LIKES sprouts? Poor things are always overshadowed by carrots and peas.
I think we should start a sprout helpline. Who's with me here?
Insanity Smurf
Me — I'm with you!
I LOVES 'EM, I DOES
THE MACHINE
I too have noticed this marvellous show. The contestants all seem to have been picked up off the street and possess a knowledge of current affairs that suggests they've been in a coma for the last decade.
But there are other hidden gems in the late-night schedules: The District, The Third Watch, Comedy Lab and, of course, who could forget Late Night Poker.
The Despotic Banana
That's the thing with Bluffy Duffy?
SUCH A COOL NICKNAME
