The Mega-Zine Museum
October 22, 2002
THE PARANOID QUEEN OF NARNIA I think it's safe to say WLW is a man. With his boyish comments and little doodles, he's gotta be. And, pray tell, what exactly is a "boyish comment"?
PARAGON Here is my review of the TV reality show Fame Academy. It's rubbish. Do you think I have a future as a TV critic? When can you start?
GENIUS AT WORK I keep losing them... where are they? Have you seen my marbles by any chance, WLW? Er... nope.
WLW
Well, I was dragged to my mum's friend's birthing party — a 43-year-old woman who insisted we listen to whale songs and Enya as she started to read bad poetry about her pregnancy and give us homemade elderflower champagne, which smelt like cat pee.
After this experience, Hell must be a doddle, unless Satan was there taking notes.
Princess Psycho
I could do with a good night out —
SO, IT SEEMS, COULD YOU!
A MESSAGE FROM THE OTHER SIDE
It's not long to go now before my big night, so I hope you 'Ziners have lots of treats for me come Halloween.
I'm really looking forward to seeing you all, wrapped up nice and warm, telling ghost stories by the fire. And those pumpkins you make... cute.
So don't let me down. Give generously. I will only ask once.
Jack O Lantern
I have a Dr Who-style scarf and a box
OF TOADS' INNARDS AT THE READY
WLW
The spellchecker on my computer always suggests that 'Zine should be zinger. According to the Oxford Talking Dictionary, zinger means:
- a thing outstandingly good of its kind
- a wisecrack; a punchline
- a surprise question; an unexpected turn of events, eg: in a plot
I believe that all three can be applied to us.
King of the Telegraph Poles
And the most important definition:
YUMMY SPICY CHICKEN FILLETY THING
SOCKS
Now — socks are really underrated.
Sure it's boring to get plain ones for your birthday, but I think comedy socks (such as Homer Simpson) are amusing and practical and hard to beat!
I peg up my silly socks with pride — long live the comedy sock!
Monk McManus
I'm sensing an equally comic selection
OF TIES AND WAISTCOATS HERE, YES?
'ZINERS
Has anyone noticed that fantastic new 'Ziner called Sykopathik Mushroom? Cool name, cool letters, he seems like a cool kinda guy.
Could you draw a picture of this fantastic new 'Ziner, or at least his namesake, a mushroom?
Sykopathik Mushroom
Wait... it's you, isn't it? You are he?
THINK I'M DAFT, DO YA? EH?
THE MATRIX
I watched The Matrix for the first time on five the other night. Not a bad film.
However, the next day, upon entering school, what did I see but a tall blonde individual wearing a long Matrix-style jacket. How sad can you get?
Of course, I'm not mentioning the pretty cute girl who wore one also... leave me alone, I'm only male!
Satan's Rubber Duck
Double standards, eh? Useful to have
IN A CUL-DE-SAC OF AN ARGUMENT
'ZINE
As a WBA fan, I must express my amusement at finding my beloved Baggies featured in a Worst Sporting Teams list. My wee brother thought I'd had a fit when it became clear a Wolves fan was behind it!
King of the Telegraph Poles — look forward to derby day versus Walsall, while we hammer six points out of Aston Vile.
This greatly cheered me up on the day the lady of my dreams turned me down for a date. You are a star!
Haze
Oh dear — I feel this Midlands-stylee
WAR OF WORDS MAY RUN AND RUN
