The Mega-Zine Museum

August 4, 2002

SAMURAI HEDGEHOG I know what's up with you, WLW. You've fallen in love with Timmy Mallett and are going to start a new life in Albania. No? Don't be soooo stoopid. We're going to Crete.

FIREBREATHING MOUSE Am I the only person in the world who finds Simon Cowell attractive? Yes.

THE SHEEP IN POLKA DOT SOCKS WLW, can you draw a picture of a sheep wearing polka dot socks? If not, can you just draw me a sheep? How can I put this...

YOU KNOW YOU'RE BORED WHEN...

• You find yourself giving every pixel on your computer screen a name.
• You find the concept of staples inexplicably hilarious.
• You feel remarkably ambivalent towards gherkins.
• You start doing faultless impressions of Tinky-Winky, handbag and all.

Bob Snitchet

Remarkably ambivalent towards gherkins,

A PHRASE YOU DON'T HEAR EVERY DAY

DEAR WLW

Been wondering for a while, but your comment on the Irish guy on RI:SE (the gorgeous Colin Murray if you were wondering) finally settled it for me... you are my best friend Amanda, come on, admit it.

You have the same sayings, comments and hatred for all things So Solid and you secretly read B*ckch*t.

I'm a bit peeved you didn't tell me earlier.

Missy Pink

I'm your best friend Amanda? Blimey —

WONDER IF ME MUM KNOWS?

WLW

Here is my Top 10 List of granny's names:

1. Gladys
2. Nancy
3. Betty
4. Brenda
5. June
6. Barbara
7. Elsie
8. Lizzy
9. Henrietta
10. Dot

Dan the Dustbin Man

What about Maud?

YOU GOTTA HAVE A MAUD IN THAT LIST

TRAGEDY

Somebody has stolen the Rainbow puppets — what kind of sick evil person would do this? It's an outrage.

Even though I'm too young to remember Rainbow, I used to have a very nice pair of Zippy socks and I am deeply hurt by this.

Iwasthemusicman

Nothing shocks me any more — not since

I SAW RIK WALLER'S LAST VID

WLW

Thank you to Outcast for thinking up some names, as I decided I couldn't be bothered.

Could I possibly ask some extremely important questions, so that I have a better picture of the sort of person you are?

1. Do you like Jam?
2. Do you have a thing against rats?
3. Do you secretly have or seek an MBE for services to broadcasting?
4. Can you draw a picture of a nuclear plant cooling tower?

False Dioxide

That would by yes, no, no...

OH, AND DEFINITELY NO!

BACTERIA

Don't you feel sorry for these poor little guys? Not only are they getting killed countless numbers of times every second, but they are so minute that nobody gets to see them in their full glory. It's as if nature has something against them.

What has bacteria done wrong, hey? They are just trying to live their normal lives.

Support bacteria, it's the only culture some people have.

Yellow Jello

Have you been watching those

SCIENCE CHANNELS ON CABLE AGAIN?

WLW AND FELLOW 'ZINERS

I recently discovered that you can put the word "ginger" into any rock band or song, and get a completely new meaning.

Observe:

Limp Bizkit... Ginger Bizkit
Fat Lip... Fat Ginger
Master Of Puppets... Master Of Gingers
Left Behind... Ginger Behind

Scary, huh?

A Leprechaun Called Steve

The scary thing is that you

DISCOVERED THIS AT ALL

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