The Mega-Zine Museum
August 13, 2001
mISS wORLD dON'T YOU HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE HAVE THE CAPS LOCK ON AND DON'T REALISE IT?! oH YES, VERY IRRITATING.
THE DESPOTIC BANANA Strangely, I woke up this morning to find myself...awake! Bizarre. I'm usually still asleep.
THE SNORKMISTRESS WLW — I am testing this address for 'Zine. Please tell me if I am in the right place and I will send e-mail! Yours hopefully... You are indeed in e-mail heaven. One mo' time for y'all, OK?: club140@teletext.co.uk
DEAR 'ZINE
Mary had a little lamb,
She kept it in a bucket.
And every time the lamb got out,
The dog would try to put it back in.
A cat would never do that...
Wednesday
Yet another reason why dogs is daft
AND CATS IS COOL
MYSTERIES OF TODAY
- How a1 ever got a record deal.
- Why my friend tries to be different by copying me.
- Why anyone ever thought that making those Claims Direct adverts was a good idea.
- Why the only Blink 182 shirt I ever found was XL.
Fredetta the Flying Fish
Mysteries indeed, although Ben from a1
IS GOOD TO HIS MUM AND ANIMALS
BORING CONVERSATIONS
Here are some handy tips to make things more interesting:
Say "doth" rather than "does". And also use the word "methinks" at every available opportunity.
Pause after every four words. Slip into another language mid-sentence to see if anyone notices.
She Who Lost The Plot
Great idea. I'll adopt your methods
THE NEXT TIME I'M IN COURT!
HEY WLW!
It annoys me when people complain about not being printed on your luscious pages and, when they finally get printed, their letter is about not doing so!
Some kind of irony, I guess. Which brings me to my point: please print me, you seem to ignore me!
Oh dear, look what happened!
Handymannequin
Amazing how many people moan about it —
AND THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW...
CALLING ALL INVENTORS
I wish to commission an inventor: good salary, paid holidays. In return for a secure job, you will be required to invent a yoghurt-lid thingy that, when opened, does not spray half of the *&%$£! yoghurt all over you, leaving thick gooey crud at the bottom.
Please send applications to the usual address: WLW Towers, 'Zineland.
Thanks for your time.
Black Widow
I hate that! If you find someone,
SEND THEM ROUND TO ME!
HOWDY DOODY
Last Saturday, I ordered a book from my local library. It was the Nirvana: Come As You Are story, but the idiots lost the book and there is apparently only one copy in Northern Ireland.
I find this really annoying, yet they have at least 20 copies of the S Club 7 book in every library!
Grrrr...
Tippohat
I think that tells us so much
ABOUT NORTHERN IRELAND
WHOEVER COVERED THE LAMPOSTS UTD MATCH
Thanks for covering this extremely important match against those awful Telegraph Poles. I was in goal during the match and it was thanks to some great saves that we managed to win that game and, consequently, win the Tall Inaminate Things Premiership.
I hope this will lead to more coverage of sport from the lower leagues on national televison.
Thanks again.
Uncontrollable Lampost of Wisdom
I saw the highlights on Sky
COULD HAVE GONE EITHER WAY
